Ingrid
exercise - https://www.ielts-exam.net/ielts_writing_samples_task_2/1122/ The impact that modern music can have is sometimes up for debate. On one hand, there is the possibility of a negative influence due to violent or disrespectful songs, while on the other hand lies the positive effect of expressing yourself and spend accumulated energy. There are certain types of music and lyrics that, for some reason or other, are considered problematic for some. It is not uncommon to see a parent worried about its son or daughter because it is listening to rock or something with a questionable message behind. The fear of a negative influence created the restrict parent and the Parental Advisory sticker on CD covers. Everyone has their favourite kinds of music and need to let some steam out. Most times, the highly judged songs are just art and a way to feel free. Because each individual have its preferences, incomprehensions can happen. That is why the older generation cannot understand the calming effect or the joy that modern music can bring to teenagers and young adults. I'm not of the opinion that a young and healthy mind can be so easily influenced and manipulated. The character formation period is already behind. Contemporary music has the power to fulfill the diverse likes of current society. Other generations should just accept newer generations musical taste instead of trying to find nonsense problems in it.
Feb 19, 2021 2:14 PM
Corrections · 1
exercise - https://www.ielts-exam.net/ielts_writing_samples_task_2/1122/ The impact that modern music can have is sometimes up for debate. On one hand, there is the possibility of a negative influence due to violent or disrespectful songs, while on the other hand lies the positive effect of expressing yourself and spending accumulated (or 'pent up') energy. There are certain types of music and lyrics that, for some reason or other, are considered problematic for some. It is not uncommon to see a parent worried about his or her son or daughter because they are listening to rock or something with a questionable message behind it. The fear of a negative influence created parent restrictions and the Parental Advisory stickers on CD covers. (A very good point) However, (you need to include linking words like this) everyone has their favourite kinds of music and need to let off some steam. Most times, the highly regarded songs are just art and a way to feel free. Because each individual has their own preferences, misunderstandings can happen. That is why the older generation cannot understand the calming effect or the joy that modern music can bring to teenagers and young adults. I'm not of the opinion that a young and healthy mind can be so easily influenced and manipulated simply by music. The character formation period is already behind. Contemporary music has the power to fulfill the diverse likes of current society. Other generations should just accept the younger generation's musical taste instead of trying to find non-existent problems in it.
Great, very well written and argued. You have some nice vocabulary. Maybe this isn't quite enough words. You could add a sentence or two to explain your points more. Don't use 'it' for people. A definite improvement, you are doing well!
Feb 19, 2021 7:42 PM
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Ingrid
Language Skills
Arabic (Egyptian), English, French, Japanese, Portuguese
Learning Language
Arabic (Egyptian), French, Japanese