Speaking of books, most of them I have already forgotten. I just know my life is changing enormously and I only rely on myself for everything. I never give up -- just like my idol Kobe, who was an amazing guy.
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I'm not sure what meaning you wanted for the second sentence. Maybe one of the following?
"I only rely on myself for everything" = I do everything independently, without asking other people to help me
"everything depends on me" or "everything depends on the choices I make" = my choices and my actions are what changes my life