Well, basically the thoughts are clearly stated and can easily be understood... although minor revisions should be made. Try this: This is my mom. She is a housewife. She is good at cooking. HER SPECIALTY IS DUMPLINGS AND TO ME, IT'S THE MOST DELICIOUS. This is me. I am in 2nd grade at Wanggil Elementary school. MY FAVOURITE is computer and I am good at typing. I am very happy FOR HAVING MY MOM AND DAD WITH ME. just a simple tip. If you can avoid repetition of words (especially pronouns), the better you english would sound. Good Luck! :)

This is my dad. He teaches computer technology. ("computer is just an object; computer technology is a subject to be taught. Does that make sense?) So, I guess I also like computer technology. This is my mom. She is a housewife. She's especially good at cooking. (there may be many things she does well but cooking is worth mentioning. This is the reason for "especially". Also, instead of she is, say "she's". it's more natural unless you want to put emphasis on "is") The most delicious to me, are the dumplings she makes. (of course she makes them for him/her. It can be stated "for me" but it's not necessary unless emphasis is needed) This is me. I am in second grade at Wanggil Elementary. I like computer technology and am good at typing on the computer. I am very happy because I have my mom and dad with me. *I hope this isn't too much information. What you wrote is very simple but very understandable. 좋아요!

thank you Kat :)

If you posted this under the "Notebook" tab, it would be easier to correct there with the editing tools. Also, you would be able to see the corrections more easily.