Allen Yu
Pay individually When you have meal with your close friend in the restaurant, is it common to pay individually or you would pay for your friend or your friend would pay for you? In China, we don't care who would pay the meal, if you pay it this time,maybe next time your friend would pay it ,we don't remember exactly who paid most,we are friends,who cares. what about in America or western countries?
Aug 8, 2014 1:31 PM
Answers · 7
If it is a very close friend, it is similar to your custom. If it is not a very close relationship, then normally each person will pay individually. If someone wants to do something special for the other person, they will offer to pay. But sometimes, the other person will not allow it because they don't want to impose on someone else. Yesterday I had breakfast at a restaurant, and I offered to pay for the meal, and she accepted. I enjoy paying for friend's meals, especially if I know that they may need the help to pay for things. I used to not be able to eat at restaurants because it was too expensive, so now that we have a little extra money in our budget, I like to help others pay. I also allow others to pay for me because I don't want to withhold a good feeling from them. In America, it feels good to offer to pay for someone's meal, so why would I want them not to feel good? Usually, if someone offers, I will say, "Are you sure?" and if they say, "Yes, I would really like to pay," then I will say, "Thank you. That's very nice of you." Or something similar to this.
August 8, 2014
I agree with Sarah: there are not strict laws in our countries about who has to pay a collective bill at a restaurant, bar or pub. It depends on the different contexts and on people's habits. When I go out with friends, colleagues or, more generally, with people I know, we are use to sharing a bill in equal parts. There is no point either in checking the detail of the one having eaten more or "more expansive foods" than another or in remembering who payed the previous time. We just receive the bill and divide it among us. However, there are some special occasions in which one may decide to pay for the gang. For example, when a person invites us to celebrate something. Or, even without any "official invitation", when at the end of a meal, someone announces that "today's on me" (I hope the translation is correct) because something good happened to him/her and he or she enjoys celebrating it by inviting the other. I can assure you that the system seems to work quite well and I can't remember about any major problem till now. Well, most likely, if there is no overt rule, it must be because everybody knows that a rule is not necessary and that a sort of balance will finally be created ... in a "spontaneous way". In simpler words: we don't need to establish anything because we know when we can let another pay and when it is our turn to do it. However, a person who would let other people pay for him/her all the time would get on everybody's nerves very quickly. And such a person would be bound to destroy this "spontaneous balance" and would force us to set up a more severe legislation about meals outside! ;-)
August 8, 2014
in my country (Saudi Arabia) and anther Arabian countries If it is a very close friend not important who will pay .. like your system If it is not a very close relationship and it was first time everybody insist to pay for other person
August 8, 2014
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