Liza
Dear native speakers, are these two sentences grammatically correct? If not, what's wrong with them? 1) To develop a business model itself, I am going to use Osterwalder’s techniques including Value Proposition Design, Prototyping and Business Processes Design. 2) It means that a company must have not only finished goods stocks like distributors have, but stocks of raw materials and spare parts, too.
Aug 12, 2018 3:09 PM
Answers · 6
1) "To develop a business model itself, I am going to use Osterwalder’s techniques including Value Proposition Design, Prototyping and Business Processes Design." If you use "itself", you are speaking about a definite business model. Therefore you must use the definite article "the": "To develop the business model itself, I am going to use Osterwalder’s techniques including Value Proposition Design, Prototyping and Business Processes Design." Or, you can use "a", to talk about a business model which is not yet definite. In this case you cannot use "itself". "To develop a business model, I am going to use Osterwalder’s techniques including Value Proposition Design, Prototyping and Business Processes Design." Both examples are correct, but I think the first one is probably better. 2) "It means that a company must have not only finished goods stocks like distributors have, but stocks of raw materials and spare parts, too." This sentence is grammatically correct, however, it is quite complex, and I think you could write it slightly differently to make it easier to read: "That means that a company must hold stocks not only of finished goods, as a distributor does, but also of raw materials and spare parts." If the subject of this sentence is an idea you have explained previously, you should use "that" instead of "it". When writing conclusions, we often say "That means ... XYZ". I have separated "like a distributor does" into a separate clause, and used commas to separate it from the rest of the sentence. You can see other examples of non-defining clauses here: https://www.ef.co.uk/english-resources/english-grammar/non-defining-relative-clauses/ "hold" is slightly more specific than "have". If the comparison between companies and distributors is very important, you could use "whereas" to make it clearer: "So, whereas distributors only need to hold stocks of finished goods, companies must hold stocks of finished goods, raw materials, and spare parts.
August 12, 2018
They're both close. In 1., drop "itself" and add a comma after "techniques" In 2., "finished goods stocks" isn't a term English speakers would generally be familiar with. Maybe use "inventory" or "stocks of finished products"?
August 12, 2018
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