Hi Joy, You are describing a hypothetical and imaginary scenario in the past. As it is impossible for you to go back in the past to take your own life, the sentence should be written as a third conditional sentence. A common structure for forming third conditional sentences is: If .... had / had not + verb (past participle form), .... would have / would not have + verb (past participle form).... "If I had been *found dead, no one would have been surprised." *The word "convinced" sounds off in your sentence, as it means that someone did something to make you believe their view or opinion. Therefore, I changed it to "found" and hope I have not changed your intended meaning. On a personal note, I have friends who are diagnosed with conditions such as bipolar disorder, so I sincerely hope that you will get better soon.

No. "convinced dead" has no obvious meaning. . If I had been found dead no one would have been surprised. I was diagnosed with anxiety and violence , suicidal thoughts several years ago. . As Mr. Lance explains "Had been" is over and past and hypothetical, imaginged.