Can you correct me?) I was born in X where I lived almost all my life My education was started in secondary school then I go to the gymnasium then get into college and finally I admitted to some unusual extra-ordinary University to become designer and engineer in one person. I believe my creative and ambitious with a lot of ideas help me design our future as a better place for better people!
Sep 24, 2018 4:34 PM
Answers · 1
I'll answer you because this is a short passage. However, in the future, you may get more response by posting your writing under Community/Notebook. I was born in X where I lived almost all my life. (use a period) My education began in secondary school; then I went to the gymnasium. (This is now grammatically correct, but it doesn't make sense. Didn't you go to primary school before secondary school? And a gymnasium is a place for exercise; the way you list it here, it sounds like it was another place that you received your education.) Afterwards, I got into college, and finally, I was admitted to an extraordinary university to become both a designer and an engineer. (It is redundant to use both 'unusual' and 'extraordinary' because they mean the same thing. 'Some' in this context is very colloquial; it is not usually found in written form.) I believe my creativity and ambition, along with a lot of ideas, is helping me to design a better future for people. (use the noun form of creative and ambitious)
September 24, 2018
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