Hi Saeiiid, Shiraz is an ancient city, which is located in southern part of Iran and it seems that its beauty has an almost magical quality. Afarin!

Shiraz is an ancient city which is located in the southern part of Iran. It seems that its beauty has an almost magical quality. Don't use a comma before 'which'. Limit your sentences to one or two ideas. You may also say it like this: Shiraz, an ancient city located in southern Iran, seems to have an almost magical beauty .

No, you don't need to add 'to it' at the end.

Thanks Do I need to add "to it" to the end od the sentence?

One small correction: Shiraz is an ancient city which is located in *the* southern part of Iran. It seems that its beauty has an almost magical quality to it. It's great. It sounds quite natural.