Hi Lucy! Thanks for inviting me to comment on this. It reads like a paragraph for an exam essay, was that what you were intending? What you have is fine. You have used linking words well (from my point of view / besides / moreover) and you have a couple of complex sentences (first and last). I'd like to see more depth to the argument. You have listed three benefits to speaking other languages but have not really explained much about them so your paragraph feels a little superficial. You have accurate vocabulary and grammar throughout. Well done!

When communicating with others in a new language, there is a great difference between face to face chats compared with using a translation software. From my point of view, learning new languages equips us with more practical skills. It enables others to understand us better, as well as our being able to exchange deep thoughts. Besides which, varying linguistic/ logical frameworks provide new ways of pondering problems. Moreover, if we go deeper into a language, we can have a better understanding of its concept and culture, as well as its unique beauty. Though learning a new language might be difficult sometimes, it's well worth the time and effort.

When communicating with others face to face, speaking a new language on one's own is really different from using translation software. From my point of view, learning new languages equips us with more practical skills. It makes ourselves understood better as well as being able to exchange deep thoughts. Besides, different linguistic logics provide new ways for us to ponder problems. Moreover, going deep into a new language, we can have a better understanding of its concept and culture, and even realize the unique beauty of the language. Though learning a new language might be difficult sometimes, it's well worth the time and effort.