It's an idiomatic expression, you can't just translate it literally.
If you want to analyze it you can think "da" as a preposition for a "complemento di scopo".
For example... take this sentence: "cose da mangiare" ( stuff to eat)
"eat" describes the role of the "stuff".
Don't try to translate "farsi" as reflexive, it's pure idiomatic.
You could say "Il da fare", it's grammatically correct but it just sounds strange in Italian.
Let's take a complete sentence, like "decide what to do"
We say "decidere cosa fare"
or "decidere il da farsi"
or "decidere sul da farsi" (decide about what to do)
but not "decidere il da fare"