My mother
After I graduated from primary school, relatives and friends all suggested that I should leave school and learn a trade to help my mother. Although I knew that I should make a living to lighten the burden of my mother, I would also like to go on with study. So I secretly took the exam and was admitted to a normal school. I dared to tell the news to my mother only because there provided free uniforms, meals, books and accommodation. I had to hand in ten Yuan as a deposit for admission, which was a large sum of money to us. For half a month, mother suffered a lot and managed to raise the money and sent me off to school with tears. She would spare no pains for her son to win a bright future. Mother and I spent a sleepless night on hearing the news that I was appointed the headmaster of a primary school after graduation. I said to her, "you can have a rest now." She replied nothing but strings of tears.
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Düzeltmeler · 4
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My mother
After I graduated from primary school, my relatives and friends all suggested that I should leave school and learn a trade to help my mother. Although I knew that I should make a living to lighten the burden of my mother, I would also like wanted to go on with study continue my studies. So I secretly took the exam and was admitted to a normal school. I dared to tell the news to my mother only because there the school provided free uniforms, meals, books and accommodation. I had to hand in ten Yuan as a deposit for admission, which was a large sum of money to us. For half a month, mother suffered a lot and managed to raise the money and sent me off to school with tears. She would spare no pains for her son to win a bright future. Mother and I spent a sleepless night together after hearing the news that I was appointed the headmaster of a primary school after graduation. I said to her, "You can have a rest now." She replied with nothing but strings of tears. (I've never heard someone say "strings of tears" before, but I think it's fine and native speakers would understand. A more standard phrase is "a flood of tears")
This is really well written! 加油！
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@Holly Thank you for your reading and revise.
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After I graduated from primary school, relatives and friends all suggested that I should leave school and learn a trade to help my mother. Although I knew that I should make a living to lighten the burden of my mother, I also (wanted to continue studying.) So I secretly took the exam and was admitted to a normal school. I (only dared to tell my mother the news) because (they) provided free uniforms, meals, books and accommodation. I had to hand in ten Yuan as a deposit for admission, which was a large sum of money to us. For half a month, my mother suffered a lot and managed to raise the money (to) send me off to school with tears. She would spare no pains for her son (to gain/to earn) a bright future. Mother and I (had) a sleepless night on hearing the news that I was appointed the headmaster of a primary school after graduation. I said to her, "you can have a rest now." She replied nothing but (floods) of tears.
Beautiful story! This is amazing. Only a few corrections about past tense use, word order and collocations. Great work :)
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