Men and women can use both. Мой is for a masculine noun wich followed after it. The girl says: - It's my table. = Девушка говорит: - Это мой СТОЛ. (СТОЛ is a masculine noun) Моя is for a feminine noun wich followed after it. The girl says: - It's my bag. = Девушка говорит: - Это моя СУМКА. (СУМКА is a feminine noun) Моё is for a neuter noun wich followed after it. The girl says: - It's my tree. = Девушка говорит: - Это моё ДЕРЕВО. (ДЕРЕВО is a neuter noun) Who says, man or woman, doesn't matter. Моя and Меня are different. Моя (мой, моё) means my. Меня (мне) means me. He is looking at ME = Он смотрит на МЕНЯ. Give ME the book = Дай МНЕ книгу.

Мой and моя are possessive pronouns, like "my " in English. When we choose the gender (мой - masculine, моя - feminine) we don't consider the gender of the possessor, the person to who something belongs. We consider the GRAMMATICAL gender of the word denoting the possessed object. You can tell the grammatical gender by the ending of a word. Here's a webpage explaining how to define the grammatical gender of a word. http://www.russianlessons.net/grammar/nouns_gender.php Examples: Мой телефон - both male or female can say that. The word телефон has a consonant in the end, so grammatically it's masculine and we must use "мой". Моя книга - can be said by a man or just as well a woman. Книга has the vowel "a" in the end, grammatically it's feminine, so we use "моя". If we talk about relations between people, we also use мой, моя and the "possessed thing" is in fact not a thing, but a person in relation to you. In this case, the grammatical gender matches the biological gender of that person. Again, it doesn't matter if the person who uses the word "my" is a woman or a man. Both a son or a daughter can say "мой отец" (отец is masculine) or "моя мама" (мама is feminine). МЕНЯ is not a possessive pronoun. It is the genitive and also the accusative form of the word "I". In simple words, it's very much similar to the English word "me". People sometimes get confused, because we use "меня" to express the idea of possession: У меня есть дом . - I have a house. But in this case, we are not saying "my house". We say, literally, "there's a house with me". Sounds odd in English, but this is a way to express this idea in Russian.

There was a similar question a few days ago. You may check the answer here: http://www.italki.com/answers/question/160386.htm If to repeat shortly: "Мой" is either a possesive adjective or a possesive pronoun, depending on its position (before or after object respectively) and stands for "My", which is changed due to the gender of the object, it is applied to. For example: МОЙ дом (MY house - masculine), МОЯ жизнь (MY life - feminine), МОЁ мнение (MY opinion - neutral), etc.

Мой is for both women and men. Actually меня,мою, моя etc never change depend on gender.

Мой - про предмет. Woman can say: это _мой_ стол, because "мой" it is about "стол", not woman.