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The best holiday
The best holiday for me is staying at home. Waking up without having to rush is heavenly to me. i have time to make my bed, take a really long bath, cook my favourite meal and eat the same thing from morning to night in front of the TV, watching korean dramas. I'd make herbal tea, sip slowly and watch all 16 episodes of Blade Man in one day. Sometimes if i don't feel like cooking, i'd eat ice cream all day and go look for dinner take out at 6. Sometimes i would buy 4 servings and keep them all in the fridge so i could eat them all day. Some days, i'd get so lazy, i'd eat Ramen all day. I'd frown when my dad takes us all for a holiday. Its too much work for me. Packing and unpacking is what i hate most. When i get home i would need to wash all that clothes n the house would be dusty. The next day, i would still be too tired to go to work because of the holiday. Not my favourite way of spending valuable time. I might sound like a negative loser but i just love staying home too much. I don't think that's a bad thing.
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Can't talk
i havent been able to talk for 3 weeks now. I have tonsillitis and its quite bad. I cough up blood every morning, which is probably because my throat is injured. When i talk, you might have a hard time understanding me because if i say "great movie" you'll probably hear "...ate ...vie". Its a combination of whisper and hoarse voice. Its terrible. I already went to an ENT specialist and he said i should take my tonsils out. Both of them. I know i am an adult and i should be okay with it but no. I am really scared of the pain after. i heard you wont be able to talk or eat. But if you have a lot of money, you can do it in a private hospital. An experienced doctor will perform the surgery for you. If you do it in a government hospital, an intern will most probably do it and that scares me a lot. my friend had his done some two years ago and he went back to the hospital after 3 weeks being discharged. he was bleeding where the tonsils were. They did a bad job and i don't want to have the same thing happen to me. I am currently using traditional medicine. It works really slow but when i am healed, the next 'wave' will be a lot later than before. I used to get high fever once every two months. Now, its every six months which is not that bad. i believe that i am healing and today i did not cough blood. I think i might be able to sing in another two months. Looking forward to that because i love singing whenever i am driving. Right now, i am loving the song 'Habits' by Tove Lo. The lyrics are terrible but the melody just stays in my head and i cant stop listening to it on my phone. Its awesome.
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have and has?
what is the difference? how do i use it?
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How do i use 's'?
"it ends when she got home"
"it ended when she got home"
how do i use 's'?
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Stages of grief
1. Denial. You do anything to distract yourself.
2. Isolation. Soon you'll get sick of company and would always want to be alone
3. Anger. You become angry, smash things, some even hurt themselves.
4. Bargaining. The idea that you are grieving starts to sink in and you might try to get back with your ex. Or if he or she is no longer alive, you'll start looking at old photos, old videos. You're bargaining with yourself "I'll feel better if i get to look at him. Just today" and spend the whole year looking at those picture every day. You know its pointless and you'll be hurting more thinking about him/her but you'd do anything to keep hold of him/her even if its only in memories.
5. Depression. You lose your passion for everything. Songs don't sound the same, food doesn't taste any good, you can't sleep or sleep too much, you cry a lot.
6. Last stage.. acceptence. You begin to come to terms with what happened and start to slowly pick up your shattered life off the floor.
i've been there. We all have.
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Oculus
I watched Oculus recently. I love horror movies. Oculus is the best. I think it is one of the most original movie i have ever seen. I have had enough with movies that ends with "Oh, i was already dead from the beginning"
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