My Holiday Story (correct the grammar) This holiday happened because to celebrate the day of Eid. My aunt and my uncle, Ummi and Aris were here now. My another aunt and uncle, Eri and Ria were here t

تسجيل الدخول

سجِّل

Nanda Vania

My Holiday Story (correct the grammar) This holiday happened because to celebrate the day of Eid. My aunt and my uncle, Ummi and Aris were here now. My another aunt and uncle, Eri and Ria were here too. But they bring their neighbour, Rifai. He is 11 years old. He has throw hair like Justin Bieber. I like hir hair because it's never untidy. That day, my uncle and my aunt, Ummi and Aris, asked me, my mom, and Rifai to join them to go to Paris Van Java or Parangtritis beach. But we aren't stops there. We go straight to Depok beach because my uncle were hungry. We are stops in front of our sucscriptions restaurant. When the waitress are making our order, me and Rifai were walking to the beach and playing water there. When the order has done, my mom called me and Rifai to go back to the restaurant. When we are arrived, there are alot of food waiting to eat. After we are full, we go to paris, but my uncle threw me to the water when the waves is coming. So I'm wet. He did it to my aunt and rifai too. but my mom were lucky. Because she is bring our bags. Si this is my story thank u

١٦ أغسطس ٢٠١٣ ١٦:٤٦

التصحيحات · 4

My Holiday Story (correct the grammar)

This holiday happened because to celebrates the day of Eid. My aunt and my uncle, Ummi and Aris were here then now. My another aunt and uncle, Eri and Ria were here too. But they bring brought <em>(all past tense)</em> their neighbour, Rifai. He is 11 years old. He has throw touselled/untidy hair like Justin Bieber. I like his hair because it's never untidy???/always untidy.
That day my uncle and my aunt, Ummi and Aris, asked me, my mom and Rifai, to join them to go to Paris Van Java or Parangtritis beach. But we aren't didn't stop there. We go went straight to Depok beach because my uncle were was hungry. We are stopped in front of our subscriptions(?) chosen restaurant. While the waitress are was taking our order, me and Rifai and I went down were walking to the beach and played in the water there.
When the order arrived has done, my mom called me and Rifai to go back to the restaurant. When we are had returned arrived, there are was a lot of food waiting to eat. After we were full, we went to Paris, but my uncle threw me in the water when the waves is were coming. So I was wet. He did it to my aunt and rifai too, but my mom was lucky because she was bringing our bags. So this is my story thank u

<em>Biggest problem was using past tense ...</em>

١٨ أغسطس ٢٠١٣

Thank u to correct my storyyy . its so help me

١٨ أغسطس ٢٠١٣

My Holiday Story (correct the grammar)

This holiday happened because to celebrate is the Day of Eid. My aunt and my uncle, Ummi and Aris, are here now. My another aunt and uncle, Eri and Ria, were here too. But they brought their neighbour, Rifai. He is 11 years old. He has throw hair like Justin Bieber. I like his hair because it's never untidy.
That day, my uncle Ummi and my aunt Aris, Ummi and Aris, asked me, my mom, and Rifai to join them to go to at Paris Van Java or Parangtritis beach. But we didn't stops there. We went straight to Depok beach because my uncle was hungry. We stopped in front of our sucscriptions(what do you mean by this) restaurant. When the waitress took our order, me and Rifai were walking to the beach and playing in the water there.
When the order was ready, my mom called me and Rifai to go back to the restaurant. When we are arrived, there was alot of food waiting for us. After we were full, we went to Paris, but my uncle threw me into the water when the waves were coming. So I got wet. He did it to my aunt and Rifai too. but my mom was lucky. Because she had our bags. Si this is my story thank u