Roses are red, Violets are blue

How would you continue these lines? 

Roses are red

Violets are blue...

 

Roses are red
Violets are blue

Everything is blue

but I don't have a clue

 

Unfair Life The worst side of having a nut father is the fact that you are genetically a potential nut. I have learnt to cope with this. I just feel sorry for myself. I could have lived my life in the route I would like if I had a real father other than a biological one. I could have been encouraged by a strong father behind. I wouldn't become that coward. I would be a better person. I wouldn't be so tired, emotionally worn out. I could have another path of life. I could be more than what I am now. I wouldn't have to accept what my life presents to me. I would ask more. But I am still passionate. This is called life. There are good things within life like him. I haven't seen him recently. I heard that he is out of the city. Maybe he went home to see his parents. He has decent parents. I will ask him about them in detail when he gets back.

Life Points Why some people are feeding on others' failures or flaws ? I wonder whether it is related to culture or not. Are people all the same around the world? People are in a race. They forget religion, they ignore virtue. People become less shameful but more independent. Is this what they call modern world? People try to be better than others. They want to earn more than you, live better than you, be happier than you, be more beautiful than you, be more talented than you, be more successful than you... It is a poor thing to see people try to get better somehow just to outpoint others. And those so called winners find relief to see losers around them. And they even force you to get involved in this silly race. I must admit that I sometimes find myself getting in this race trying to pick up some points too.

Work work I have lots of work to do but I don't want to work any more tonight. I wish there is somebody to finish this paper for me. I wonder if there will be a person ever who can make a favor to me. I want to write about some good stuff from my day. I saw him again. He was not indifferent at all, but he was hesitating. I don't mind what he feels. I don't even know him well. I am very weak but I feel strong when he is around me. Sometimes the opposite happens, I feel weak when he is around me. This is weird. I should concentrate on my work now. If I can finish it now, I will be free tomorrow.

Jealousy Sometimes we all envy somebody. We wish to be in their shoes. Aren't we? Today I have got news from a friend. She wrote me that she is going to USA for a Master Degree for the upcoming year. Am I jealous? I am happy for her, but deep inside I may be a little jealous. I think I am killing myself with my family problems. I again started to pity myself and remember that I'm a loser. When this happens, my day sucks. And watching others' joy hurts. Yeah still there are people who want to be in my shoes, yeah I'm still in a better condition than some people in some parts of the world. This doesn't change my mood.

But ehm..ehm

Some native speakers very often say "but ehm..." instead of a quick "but" . What is the reason for that ? Is it always a pause to think or is there any other reason for that ?

 

Compensation A friend here wrote me that I am a good example of compensation in psychology. I found out that it is a kind of defense mechanism in which people overachieve in one area to compensate for failures in another. For example, individuals with poor family lives may direct their energy into excelling above and beyond what is required at work. It is true that I compensate myself within life. I try to earn a lot of money and live in luxury. I want to reward myself because nobody rewarded me in my life. Actually, life doesn't reward you, you are the one who would take the reward from life.

Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased This is a big lie. At least it is not true for my case. It is not easy to share my pain with others. I believe when people know about my pain, I become vulnerable and I fear that they could hurt me cruelly. I have been there before. I can't talk about my feelings with someone else other than my mom. If I can tell others about my problems, I know I won't feel any better. This is me. I can't change myself. I don't rely on people. I don't like to look like a weak person. Who likes? Everyday I wear a mask and go to the work. I pretend to be strong, but inside I am very weak. People admire me that's real, they don't know there is a wrecked person inside. I try to wear chic clothes. I try to look perfect as if I had a perfect family. This mask sometimes tires me out because it becomes too heavy to carry. Still I get up, hold my mask and place it perfectly on my face without leaving any space at the surface.

Being the daughter of a schizophrene My father is schizophrene and sometimes his illness gets worse and we put him into a mental hospital. He stays there till he gets normal. I am always ashamed of his illness. And I was always scared of losing him. He is my father whether he is normal or not. I have never got the feeling that I have a strong father behind. He was absent, he wasn't with us. I often hated him. I sometimes prayed for his death, then I felt guilty. He leaves me helpless. He becomes aggressive when he is ill. And even when he is normal he is not completely normal. And he stays in hospital every two years. Being a daughter of a schizophrene, I am a scared and introvert person. My friends don't know the situation. I don't tell them because I feel ashamed. A few minutes ago, I called the hospital because I couldn't visit him today. And the nurse told me that he had fight with other people and she also added that he is not good at the moment. I wanted to talk to him and she agreed. He came to the phone and I asked "How are you?" He answered "I am fine." But he could hardly speak because of the drugs. I told him not to quarrel with others, and he told me that he doesn't need my advice. I felt deeply sorry for him and for my family. I am trying to find something to enjoy myself, but it is not easy. I wonder how long I can endure this. He is getting older and I am very hopeless about our future. I cry most of the times and I just pray God, but I know I can't have a healthy father no matter how much I pray. I wish I had a great father, a hero, a model and a father I could admire...