A formal email

Dear Sir / Madam,

I am writing because I am interested in your golf lessons in Florida. I would be am interested in a two-week course but also as well as in your private lessons. I am 47 and I work as a Ccomputer Pprogrammer for a Spanish bank. I have some experience playing golf although I would say my level is just beginner (consider myself a beginner: this just sounds a bit more natural.) I can speak a little English, so I want to improve my golf level (game: although not incorrect, Americans would use the term "golf game" instead of level) and practise practice the English.

Could (Would: more polite) you please send me information about prices of for the two-week courses and the private lessons ? Could I have and provide me with a list of different places of in Florida where you give offer the courses? I also would be grateful if you could give me for some advice or information about accommodations.

Looking (I am looking: more appropriate in a formal letter) forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully, (Sincerely,: more appropriate for a formal letter)

Fernando O.

Note: Fernando - With a few minor exceptions, this letter was perfectly written and very understandable. Don't let the corrections that I made fool you. Your English is excellent and in most cases, the corrections are meant to merely provide you with alternate, more natural-sounding words and phrases. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask. - Syl

A formal email

Dear Sir / Madam,

I am writing because I am interested in your golf lessons in Florida. I am  interested in a two-week course but and also your private lessons. I am 47 and I work as a Computer Programmer for a Spanish bank. I have some experience playing golf although I would consider myself a beginner. I can speak a little English, so I want to improve my golf level and practise my English.

Could you please send me information about prices of the two-week courses and also the private lessons? Could I have a list of the different places in Florida where you give offer/run the courses? I also would be grateful if you could send me some advice or information about/regarding accommodation.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours sincerely,

Fernando O.

Very well written, it only needed some minor corrections. Good comments and advice from Syl.

Good luck with your golf.

Dear Sir / Madam, 

I am writing because I am interested in your golf lessons in Florida. I would be interested in both a two-week course and your private lessons. I am 47 and I work as a Computer Programmer for a Spanish bank. I have some experience playing golf, although I would say i'm just a beginner. I can speak a little English, so I would like to improve my golf skills and practise English.

Could you please send me information about the prices of two-week courses and private lessons? Could I have a list of different places of Florida where you run the courses? I would also be grateful if you could give me some advice or information about accommodation.

I'm looking forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Fernando O.