Although women often portray themselves as wanting to date kind, sensitive, and emotionally expressive men, the nice guy stereotype contends that, when actually presented with a choice between such a 'nice guy' and an unkind, insensitive, emotionally-closed, 'macho man' or 'jerk,' they invariably reject the nice guy in favor of his 'so-called' macho competitor.
That is why 'nice guys finish last' ,but I don't believe that as a rule , it might be true for 'mean women' to want to meet 'jerks' ,but 'nice girls' definitley like to meet 'nice guys' and I see no contradiction between having a mind of one's own and being nice,it is just that most guys fail to achieve this balance !