ending U arrive, she is a little worried and u also, coz its the first time u can see her, watch her body, smell her, touch her..u re becoming more confident and everything returns - every feelings, emotions. U touch each others, smell, feel, caress, laugh. She is happy, Then u notice that she is different from who she was on internet and conversations. She doesnt do what she says. Some plans remain just plan and leave in past, just good recollection. U feel more and more, u want her every minute, u miss her even she is next to u. She doesnt seem to be like she used to be. She spends time regularly with her vitual friends, maybe important but not such as u. But anyway sometimes she is good with u, she caress u, kiss, hug u. U want her more with u, u say it to her but she doesnt understand , u explain her what u feel, she says dont complain. How can nt she understand that u go away in few days. U undersatn ure so different. ure not so important for her like she says, u feel her less than 3 month ago. u notice than she is addicted to her phone and virtual friends. But U, ure with her, ure REAL. She wanted u so much but notso much now. u argue every time and she says sorry and cry but u dont believe her and think its last time but in the morning u miss her so much and dont think about bad. She kisses periodicaly, hugs, says good words, it repeats but u dont want to lose her, she is good with u and ure happy, In last days she says she doesnt want u to leave but her actions say opposite. U are tottaly disappointed with her lie. She event doesnt try to understand ur feelings. She doesnt spend time with u, according to her words and when spend - it's so little that u suffer more. Last minutes with her were like she doesnt care ure leaving. U hold each other hands but u feel she is far away. she is somewhere in thoughts - not with u. She even doesnt miss u when u left. she says opposite but u feel better that everything is in past and just sweet recollections and photo warm ur soul and heart but the same memory hurts u. She is the best u have ever had, u miss her every day even she doesnt. u feel her the same but understand it cant last like that. Just u must live real life. Maybe she needs time to grow up, to understand some things but. Thank u for these months, for all happiness, all nights, all smiles, u gave me, thank u for let me discover myself more, understand many things, sorry for tears and bad words, but they were because ure very important for me, my Kika.