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Riman
Technological advances are very important for humans’ development. However, like any other thing in life, it has advantages and disadvantages. In the first place, technological advances facilitate humans’ life, and make the access to information easier. For instance, in these days, you can find millions of information on your computer or gadgets by using the internet, in your place, without going anywhere to find out these information in books. Nevertheless, these technologies have something bad to do to us. For example, many of scientific studies have found that using the internet for so long has negative effects on human’s brain especially in children. These studies says that using the internet by the children aged less than two years, for more than 30 minutes a day increases the risk of autism. To sum up, technological advances are very important to our life, but we should know how to get benefit from them without harming our health.
2021年12月26日 08:04
訂正 · 2
Technological advances are very important for human development. However, like any other thing in life, they have advantages and disadvantages. In the first place, technological advances facilitate human life, and make access to information easier. For instance, nowadays you can find millions of bits information on your computer or gadgets using the internet, without needing to go anywhere or refer to other sources like books etc. Nevertheless, these technologies may also be harmful to us. For example, many scientific studies have found that using the internet for too long has negative effects on the human brain, especially in children. These studies say that usage of the internet by children aged less than two years, for more than 30 minutes a day increases the risk of autism. To sum up, technological advances are very important for us, but we should know how to benefit from them without our harming our health.
Hello Roman, I’ve just corrected your essay to make it more readable. If you like it, please book a lesson and we can take things further. Best wishes for the holiday season.
2021年12月28日
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