我也来风花雪月、附庸风雅一回。
美人卷珠帘,
深坐蹙蛾眉,
但见泪痕湿,
不知心恨谁.
The beauty opens the pearly casement,
sits for a long time, and begins to frown.
A vestige of tears is left as they are falling down.
No one knows who she hates when hearing her moan.
<a href="http://melaminefree.antserve.com/Hatred%20and%20Love.mp3">http://melaminefree.antserve.com/Hatred%20and%20Love.mp3</a>;
New version:
The pearly curtain is opened and a beauty is shown.
She sits for a long time, knitting her elegant and curly eyebrows in a frown.
Vestiges are left as tears are trickling down.
No one knows who she hates when hearing her moan.
<a href="http://melaminefree.antserve.com/Hatred%20and%20Love%20V3.mp3">http://melaminefree.antserve.com/Hatred%20and%20Love%20V3.mp3
</a>
By your requested email, here are my unvarnished comments on your poetry recitation. The English version uses the intonation of Chinese rhythm. Hence it sounds very funny & garrish. Too much of a sing-song to English ears. Your Mandarin and Wu are superb because these sounds are designed for Chinese rhythm & tones.
This is also not your fault that the translated meteric rhythm of the translation is out of whack in English. It must be changed and thus sacrificing translation accuracy.
BTW, the pronunciation of 不 is exactly the same in Cantonese & Wu.
Here's one English rhythm:
Pearly curtains drawn,
A beauty revealed.
A long time she sits,
Knitting her brows in frown.
Tears ---
Not yet dried.
With whom she hates,
No one knows.
I don't think this woman is unstable. All of us are irrational when in we are in love, the silly things we do. Love makes logical people do stupid things. Ahhh.... the joys and tribulations of young love.
Thanks Michael.
