I am a lazy learner I used to write with only what I have already known, I never thought about forcing myself to use advanced words, which is important I am so impressed to see there are so many language learners above 30 or maybe 40 years old. I thought age is vital, its actually not, your will is.

Unyieldingness Learning grammar is easy, learning a language is not. I'm so touched to see there are so many optimistic language learners in the world, they sacrificied a lot for their goals or dreams when they are already so talented and outstanding. So why should I give up? I will never give up.

I guess there is much more Chinese than English speakers here Why I do not have a friend Yep, I don't have a friend, I didn't know why, but now I know, so I guess I can share it with others and maybe I could make some new online friends. because I have mental disoders, and my parents are crazy too. They have really bad influences on me. I became really depressed when in middle school, thank God I didn't kill myself, or I would have had wasted so beautiful a life ahead. I have never had a boyfriend, right. I know it's sad, but mostly it's because of myself, I want to express my heartful apologies to many people. It's all my fault. Yes, I have psychoneurosis too. I am reading a book written by an American many years ago, firstly I thought it was just bs, well it's actually not, I should believe in myself. What I told myself is, life sucks. But it'll be cool if I could challenge myself a little bit and see where it goes. Don't judge me, saying I'm way too passive or what. People, except some excellent ones, will never trully stand in someone eles's shoes. But I will be really grateful if you could help me correcting this notebook. God bless. In the end, why I don't have a friend? It's a long story, I will tell you later.

My English-learning Experience And the Psychological Changes Happened to Me. I'm a Chinese girl, I have been learning English since middle school, well, I have to say, in China, most of the students learn it for exams, the textbooks were usually published from 20 years ago, and what we learned is usually grammars and some simple expressions, some grammar questions even quetioned the teachers, but i found it easy for me to learn it, so i guess thats why i liked it. Now, i am preparing for the post graduate education entrance exams, the english is really different from what I learned in high school, it's just difficult! I can't follow the VOA or BBC, I tried to type down what the reporters said this morning, only to found myself stare the screen with a blank brain.... "What did he say?" I asked myself, I rewinded the recordind again and again, and finally, I gave up, I told myself that it might just because I just woke up, I should do it in another time when I feel better with a clearer mind. so, that's it. let alone speak with standard American accent, I cannot even understand what the reporters say. Another thing bothers me is, when check the texts out, I found that nearly 80% words are familiar... :( I don't know what I am supposed to do,maybe I should just "Pratice, practice and practice" all the time. well, actually, i know the biggest problem on me is that I'm lazy, yes I know, I spend only 3 hours on English learning, and think about other stuffs most of the time while studying, maybe I am too stressed, maybe I am just don't like it as much as I used to be, I feel rather tired of what I am doing now, I know, I don't dislike English, I just dislike the way I'm "learning" it (if it can be called as learning"). so, to overcome the my current laziness, i bought quiet a few books about how to learn or work, such as Mega Memorry by Kevin Trudeau; Tomato Work by Mario Fusco... they are really good books, but I some how can not focus. as long as I find difficulties I would complain about my childhood, my parents... so I guess maybe I should settle my psychological problems, what did i read again? well, I really love the book, it's called Road Less Travled by M. Scott Peck. It's really amazing, I found that most of my problems came from my mom, the way she treated me. And I finally wasn't that confused with the world, I realized that it's not just me--many people suffer similiar problems as I do, and what's more woderful, I realized that I Can be cured in some proper ways. Finally, I don't see the world and myself in a very passive wa