Dani
Today is a common Autumn day. After getting off the bus, I got on a shared bike, cycling with the tempo of a pop song, amidst the cool wind. It is hard to define today. It is perceptible that the temperature is getting cool. Now it is the downfall of summer. The hot day almost disappears. When I cycle the bus, I even have to clench my fist to keep myself warm. Cold days are tentative, and hot days wink and say goodbye. Birds are also leaving. One of my friends likes to watch birds with binoculars. He once made an analogy between birds and songs. He loves birds so deeply, but he can't cope with animals with fur. He is allergic. He bought many counterfeits of birds. Some of them even from many cosmopolitan cities. His girlfriend told him not to spend too much money on "unnecessary things", but he is inexorable.
20 wrz 2023 13:15
Poprawki · 1
Today is a regular Autumn day. After getting off the bus, I got on a shared bike, cycling with the tempo of a pop song, amidst the cool wind. It is hard to define today. It is perceptible that the temperature is getting cool now that it is the downfall of summer. The hot days are almost gone. When I take the bus, I even have to clench my fist to keep myself warm. Cold days are tentative, and hot days wink and say goodbye. Birds are also leaving. One of my friends likes to watch birds with binoculars. He once made an analogy between birds and songs. He loves birds so deeply, but he can't cope with animals with fur as he is allergic. He bought many counterfeits of birds. Some of them even from many cosmopolitan cities. His girlfriend told him not to spend too much money on "unnecessary things", but he is inexorable.
Great work Dani, I'm not sure what you mean by 'counterfeits of birds' - possibly you mean models or ornaments? Also inexorable is not incorrect and is a beautiful word but may be a little 'grand' given the tone of the writing. It might be better to say 'but he cannot be stopped!'
20 września 2023
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