who can help me?
who can help me with this composition?help me correct some mistakes from them.thank u so much....
As a human who lived in this world,it's no denying that most people focus on their work during their adult life,leading to necessary to find out the factors contribute to job satisfaction.In this paper,I'd like to analyze the topic and explain some of my opinions prior to point out my personal suggestions.
The most immediate factor is appropriate salary.On the one hand,a competitive payment has great impact on the emotion of the people.The money will not only entitle the folk to buy more luxury to make them happy but also let the people feel they are special guys who are working on a valuable working.On the other hand,a lot of my friends,including myself,intend to or are planning to change the jobs because of unacceptable salary which is a real evident to prove low-wage conducts to job satisfaction.
An equally important factor might be stability of the job.While the jobholders are complaining the income,another group of people are living in fear to worry lose their jobs.Obviously,they have to pay more time and energy to save careers,rather than enjoy their life and families.This will extremely discount the attitude of employees for the job.
One more consideration worth mentioning is about incentive policy.Well-defined reward policy could motivate people to run their career path and produce more personal interesting on job.In addition,such kind of policy could output strong achievement to the employee which is hard to be replaced by others.
Taking into account what i have been mentioning about the factors contribute to job satisfaction.I am further convinced that following measures should be taken so as to improve the job satisfaction of people.Firstly,government should draft related laws to guarantee all the folk can get reasonable payment from employer.Secondly,job candidates should consider more seriously for the unemployment risk to avoid unnecessary job losing.Last but not least,enterprise should draw up a detailed policy to ensure every employee has sufficient confidence to keep moving on their job.Only in that ways can we enhance the job satisfaction.

Question

who can help me?
who can help me with this composition?help me correct some mistakes from them.thank u so much....
As a human who lived in this world,it's no denying that most people focus on their work during their adult life,leading to necessary to find out the factors contribute to job satisfaction.In this paper,I'd like to analyze the topic and explain some of my opinions prior to point out my personal suggestions.
The most immediate factor is appropriate salary.On the one hand,a competitive payment has great impact on the emotion of the people.The money will not only entitle the folk to buy more luxury to make them happy but also let the people feel they are special guys who are working on a valuable working.On the other hand,a lot of my friends,including myself,intend to or are planning to change the jobs because of unacceptable salary which is a real evident to prove low-wage conducts to job satisfaction.
An equally important factor might be stability of the job.While the jobholders are complaining the income,another group of people are living in fear to worry lose their jobs.Obviously,they have to pay more time and energy to save careers,rather than enjoy their life and families.This will extremely discount the attitude of employees for the job.
One more consideration worth mentioning is about incentive policy.Well-defined reward policy could motivate people to run their career path and produce more personal interesting on job.In addition,such kind of policy could output strong achievement to the employee which is hard to be replaced by others.
Taking into account what i have been mentioning about the factors contribute to job satisfaction.I am further convinced that following measures should be taken so as to improve the job satisfaction of people.Firstly,government should draft related laws to guarantee all the folk can get reasonable payment from employer.Secondly,job candidates should consider more seriously for the unemployment risk to avoid unnecessary job losing.Last but not least,enterprise should draw up a detailed policy to ensure every employee has sufficient confidence to keep moving on their job.Only in that ways can we enhance the job satisfaction.

Answer

As a person living in modern society, it's no denying that most people focus on their work during their adult lives. In this paper, I'd like to analyze the necessary factors which contribute to job satisfaction, and explain some of my opinions and personal suggestions.

The most important factor is an appropriate salary. On one hand, a competitive salary has a great impact on the satisfaction of a person. The money will not only help them to buy more luxuries to make themselves happy, but will also make them feel more valuable in their workplace. On the other hand, many people consider changing jobs because of unacceptable pay-rates; which is enough to prove that a low-wage contributes to job dissatisfaction.

An equally important factor might be job stability. While the employees are complaining about their income, another group of people are living in constant fear and worry of losing their jobs. Obviously, they have to spend more time and energy to save their careers rather than enjoying their lives and their families. This will tremendously affect the attitudes of employees on the job.

One more consideration worth mentioning is the incentive policy. A well-defined reward policy could motivate people to stay in their career paths and produce more vigor for the job. In addition, such kind of policy could produce better achievements from employees who are irreplaceable assets to the company.

Taking into account what I have mentioned, I am convinced that following these measures could drastically improve employee satisfaction. Firstly, government should draft related laws to guarantee everyone's reasonable payment from their employer. Secondly, employees should consider unemployment more seriously and avoid unnecessary risks of losing their jobs. And last, but not least, companies should draw up detailed policies to ensure that every employee has the sufficient confidence to stay motivated on their jobs. Only in that way could we enhance the job satisfaction.

/// This is great! I loved reading it! ///

Answer

I like the topic of this paper. It's true that employment is a stress throughout adult life, especially when we are young and haven't delved into a particular career.

The main thing I noticed is that you sometimes used adjectives as nouns.  'necessary' and 'interesting' are both adjectives, but from the structure of the sentence, it looks like you are trying to use them as nouns.

Also, it sounds like your thesis statement is "I would like to analyze this topic." I would consider this pretty vague. I would say something like " I think that job satisfaction is based on appropriate salary, ..."

Answer

Again notebook entries are a lot better and easier to correct. Particularly for long compostions such as yours.

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