This is a British English perspective: If you use a singular verb, you are treating 'my family' as as single entity. If you use a plural verb, you are focusing on the set of individuals who make up that family. 1. My family is coming = a single entity My family are coming = a set of individuals Both of these are fine in British English, and there isn't any difference in meaning. 2. My family is big = There are a lot of people in my family. My family are big = The people in my family are big - they are all large/fat

In the US and Canada, "family" is always singular because the word is formally singular -- as in Spanish. In other varieties of English, it is either singular or plural ("notionally plural") depending on the situation.

When you use My family with verb to be in singular, you're referring to your family as a group or entity. I.e: my family is in the US. it means that all of your family is there, living together in the same house. If you use the verb to be in plural in this case, you're talking about all of your family members separately. so if you say "my family are in the US", you mean that all of your family members are in the US, but they can be living in thifferent houses, neighborhoods or cities.

Yes, you are right that being a collective noun, it should take a singular verb. However, it is quite common for native English speakers to use a plural verb, so you will definitely hear 'My family are coming', and could say it without sounding incorrect. 'are big' would not be said though.