Be Slower at All Things Once a mom asked me how to be a good company? I have a profound and vivid experience: before a baby can communicate freely with adults, parents should control themselves as best as they can so that the baby will not be disturbed. I have learned many lessons from my own experience. I read a good collection of books on early education as possible since the beginning of pregnancy. Those books equipped me with a thinking model of elite education. I even arranged a course schedule as early as the baby was still in the womb (though the courses were taken by me). When the baby was four to five months old, I gradually arranged game-based courses in the light of parenting books and methods of parents who are successful in family education. However, I took a beating. Xiaoquan (my baby) rewarded me in his own way: he has his own learning rhythm. I measured his IQ, but could not find any special potential that makes me delighted. After these blows, I was slightly disappointed for a time. Why the education plans in those books did not take any effect on Xiaoquan? Why our family could not have a child prodigy? At last, I could do nothing but accept the truth: most children are average and yet happy kids who learn everything by nature but not like a child prodigy. What I need most is patience. In fact, Xiaoquan just started to show slight interest in stories from 3 years old. For most of the time, he would just play with the toys in his own way. The repetitive playing model and the “play house” game without logic or plot are just his learning process to explore the world. Learning does not necessarily mean to sit on a seat earnestly and write words orderly. He was fond of the homework assigned by his foreign teacher, but he did it in his own way. He painted on the whole paper. The foreign teacher kindly reminded me that it would be just fine as long as Xiaoquan felt the learning process was fun. I also got used to the idea that I would not wish him to speak a foreign language fluently in just a few hours in a week. The learning and training of a language needs immersion in an environment. A mom who engages in interpretation mentioned in her book that we need to provide kids with an immersive environment without any utillitarian purpose. Such a period shall last for one year to one and a half years, which is only a start.

Back to italki Time really flies! It's been 3 years since I signed in italki last time. During these 3 years, I tasted both happiness and bitterness truly grew up. I'm 27 years old now. Once, I thought I was a totally free person, so I could do whatever I want to. Until March 2013, my dearest mom, the most important person in my life, was sent to our local mental hospital. She had always been struggling with mental schizophrenia since she was 22 years old, a young lady. In 2013, the fifth time when she was sent to a hospital, she stayed there for a whole month. The psychiatrist, I would rather just call her a doctor who is not that professional, gave her such a large amount of pills that my mom had to take over 20 pills a day. After that, she was not so well in the following two years. On June 29, 2015, I would never forgot that day, she took 98 pills and wanted to leave this world. She felt meaningless about the life, painful about the illness, and guilty for being a burden to the family. Neither me nor Dad ever regarded her as a burden. We treasure and value the contributions she has made to our family. How came her such thoughts! Thanks to God's bless, she was timely saved. This time, she was treated in another hospital, the psychiatrist diagnosed her as major depressive disorder. She was received MECT treatment. Now, four months later, she's been getting better and better. I am so glad. She is living with me now. She cook meals for me. If I don't need to go to work, I'll take her to different parks and scenic spots. She is much happier now. She could sleep soundly. I'll get married in next May. She is looking forward to looking after my baby after I get married. :P I feel the dark clouds finally dissipated. I feel grateful. I will never ever let her trapped in sadness again. I am confident in making her happy forever. No matter what happens in your life, never give up. If you keep fighting, the devil will finally flee.

Translation of a Chinese Poem

Translation of a Chinese Poem This is a Chinese poem I wrote one year ago. Now I want to translate it into English to share it with you. Feel free to polish the translted version or write another translation or just give comments. :) 独立自强 Independence 小河蜿蜒，志归大海， Rivers wriggle, desiring to pour into the sea. 小树茁壮，志在参天， Trees prosper, wishing to touch the sky. 是花儿，就该绚烂， Flowers are born to bloom. 是星儿，就该闪耀， Stars are meant to shine. 不做藤曼，不蔓不枝， Never be a vine with creepers and branches. 做一棵树，立成风景， Just be a tree, standing as a scenic view. 用寂寞，换来自由， Get freedom with loliness. 用自由，消解寂寞， Kill lonliness with freedom. 幸福简单，道路却难， Happiness is simple while the road is tough. 活的快乐，每天一点， Live joyously, at least a bit everyday. 不狂喜，不彻悲， Don't ecstasize; don't grieve uncontrollably. 不言弃，不固执， Don't give up; don't be too stubborn. 不把暂时当成永恒， Don't take a moment as eternity. 不把话语当成誓言， Don't count words as promises. 用行动浇开果实， Take action and you will get fruits. 用坚持创造奇迹， Keep holding on and you will see miracles. 行动是一切基石， Action is the footstone of all. 改变在每时每刻， Every minute you can make a change. 抬起头向前看， Head up and look forward: 我的未来正鲜！ The future is just fresh and new!

Recently I Cannot Sleep Well Recently I cannot sleep well. I dream too many dreams over the night. I can still remember some plots when I wake up. The dreams are about some old friends or company work. Maybe I have been too stressed and anxious about my current life. I should try to clear my head and take things easy. As long I do my best, I won't have regrets.

My Drawback Yesterday I asked a friend "What do you think my drawback is?". The friend answered "Too emotional." This answer surprised me, but it is true. Being emotional may be interpreted in different ways. But in my case, I get emotions too much involved in my thinking, words and deeds. I easily generate a sad, happy or compassionate feeling. How to be less emotional?

Do You Wanna Try Beijing Subway? As winter comes, I cannot ride my motorcycle to work any longer due to the coldness. Instead, I usually take a bus except a few times when I left home late and I had to take the subway Line 13. Here I'd like to be your subway guide, and you my dear reader yourself decide to try or not. Outside Shangdi subway station, there are zigzagging shoulder-high iron bars to form narrow paths. You have to rub your feet slowly forward at tiny paces following the crowd. It takes minutes to pass the door. I saw once during this process that a boy jumped over the bars swiftly like Spiderman and made his shortcut to get inside. After you get in with patience, there is a belt check security machine waiting for you. You are supposed to put all your stuff on the belt and get them back from the other side. Personally I doubt whether the security staff really watch the monitoring screen. Now swap your ticket card and come onto the platform. Don't be shocked if you see endless lines. You should quickly join the shortest queue using your wise judgement. At most two minutes later, your train will come. Never imagine you could get on the first three trains. You would be lucky enough if you successfully make a stand on the fourth. No need for panic if your clothes or bag gets stuck by the door. A patroler will come out in time to put you all in. Now wish you safe journey! In the carriage, your body would be in tight contact with others'. It is weird to think that you are so closely surrounded by strangers. However, you have to bear that and control your temper. Ocassionally I heard two people quarrelling. The single reason is crowdedness. I suppose blatant quarrel is anything but a pleasant experience. How do you like the fast but not-so-perfect journey? However, it is what many people are experiencing everyday. Maybe they are not willing to, but this is just life.

Any differences? What are the differences of I think, I believe, I suppose, I guess, I assume, I figure...?

The Aged Who Lost Their Only Child I just read an article about "失独老人" which means the aged who lost their only child. (Sorry for the long translation. Welcome to optimize it.) As you may know, nowadays most Chinese families have only one child. My family is one of them. The article tells that the number of Chinese only-children aging from 15 to 30 reaches 190 million. The annual death rate of this age group is 0.04%, which causes 76,000 families losing their only child per year. I felt shocked and heavy-hearted at the statistics. In Chinese culture, parents usually live with their child when they get old. The child and grandchild are the source of all their happiness. Children usually support their old parents mentally, physically and financially. It is hard to imagine how the parents' life will be after they lose their only child. They feel especially miserable on festivals and birthdays. Some aged people have little income and the pension system is not so perfect. Their living standard is to be worried. Any solution to this problem? Firstly the government should allow more births per family. China has adopted One Child Plicy since 1982. Now 30 years has passed, and the policy does not apply to the reality any longer. Secondly, the government and society should provide more assitance and care to the aged who lost their only child. In this way, they will feel warm and hopeful again. Last but not least, children should take good care of themselves for their parents' sake.