Hi Susan, I get many students with social anxiety.
First of all, you should find teachers you are absolutely comfortable with. Pay a lot of attention to the introduction videos and see what your gut reaction is. Maybe you feel more at ease with men or maybe with women? Or the sound of the voice? It's amazing how every little thing contributes to making us feel at ease.
You can prep yourself by choosing to have lessons in a part of the house you feel more comfortable in, with reassuring objects near you.
Listening to something just before lessons, like half an hour before, is very beneficial no matter what your level is. It simply preps your brain, gets you in the mood AND calms you down because your brain is prepared.
As a teacher, to calm my students, I make them talk about neutral topics. That is things that they're not overly passionate about.The weather, what they eat at meals, their commute, things like that.
The quality of the discourse goes down when talking about things you have strong feelings for. Of course, you have to be able to do that too, but at the right moment.
I've noticed that joking can make things worse so I wouldn't recommend it unless it's genuine and heartfelt.
