Some words from TED Why someone is always upset and uncontent? Connection is why we were here. Shame and fear is usually comes from I'm not good enough. From her (the speaker's) several years' research, she found out that the group of people, who were always happy and satisfied about their life, were willing to accept their weakness. They believe that what makes me vulnerable makes me beautiful. They embrace vulnerability. We always want to control our vulnerability. But what we don't know is, the way to control vulnerability is stop control vulnerability. It's seems like the place we get our vulnerability, is also the birth place of joy, love and creativity. You are fear and shame of your vulnerability facing with your worthness which you struggle for. You numb it, as well as you numb joy, gratitude and happiness at the same time.It's like a vicious circle, you just can't stop and jump out of it. Then she realized and learnt something that she never thought of. We always make the uncertain certain. That just makes us more afraid and fear. Then, blame, a way for us to discharge pain and discomfort. We perfect the most in our children. But we can't let them believe that they are flawless. The thing you should say to your children is - you know what, you are imperfect, you're wild for struggle. But you are worthy love and belonging. We pretend like what we were doing have no significant impact on other people. We are sorry, we'll fix it. To let ourselves seen. Deeply seen. Vulnerably seen. To love wth our whole heart, even there is no garentee. To practice gratitude lean into joy, in the moment we are terrified to say can I love you this much. I'm just so grateful, because feeling this vulnerable, means I'm still alive. ^^