I'm assuming you're talking about the song from A Fine Frenzy?
She's a very poetic person, and some of her lyrics are difficult to understand, even for me. I have often wondered what she means by 'ashes and wine'.
My best guess is that she is talking about a burnt-out fire (a metaphor for a love that is no longer strong) and wine left over from good experiences. That's just a guess, though, because I didn't write the song. I just like it a lot :D