04/06 I tried to Write a story

He was born blind.  and She was born blind. They met each other on a park bench under a cherry blossom tree in spring. They sat. and They felt peace. in that The warm weather was warm and the flowers smelt good. with that sweet smell of flowers, Suddenly he turned his head... she was looking at him and in that instante when he and she look each other's eyes, they saw for the first time. [Illogical.  They are blind.  So how can they see each other?]

She felt his gaze.  It was one with kindness and care.  He felt her gaze.  It was one with sweetness like the flowers in spring.  It was love they felt.  and It was the most beautiful thing they saw in the eyes of their mind. could have ever seen in their lifes.

Good story.  What you wrote is not grammatically wrong per say.  However, when telling a story, you need to have pauses, actions to make it come alive.  Short sentences describe quick action etc.  Long sentences give pause and warmth.

Translate your version and mine into Spanish.  Perhaps you get what I mean.

04/06 I tried to Write a story

He and she were born blind, They met each other at a park bench under a cherry blossom tree in spring. They sat and felt peace in that warm weather with that sweet smell of flowers. Suddenly he turn his head. She was looking at him and in that instant when he and she looked into each other's eyes, they saw for the first time. It was love and it was the most beautiful thing they could have ever seen in their lives.

[Very nice.]