I'm sorry, I'm still the same
My deepest fear is that one day I wake up and find myself living the life of an ordinary man with no ambition to change or have more.
I'm still a student so maybe I've sometime left, but what I'm afraid of is what comes after that.
What if I got an ordinary crappy job with nothing to hope for or aspire to? what if I don't make enough money to travel, see the world like I've always dreamed to..
So that's the reason I want to change, because I don't want to ever face that. I don't want to ever need to look for a better job or bargain for a couple of dollars higher salary. I despise that and I never want to do that ever in my life.
But, as much as I want to be better and to not need to do all that crappy things ordinary people are forced to do by life I can't do it without real change and without hard work.
But change isn't easy at all. Each morning I hear the alarm at 6:00 AM and I start telling myself that it's not worth it, I should get more sleep..
Most of the time I do keep sleeping, at that moment I let go of every dream I have, I kill every hope to change.
I regret that. I regret all the times I chose to continue sleeping. I regret all the times I chose to rest..
And I always wish that the next time I get to my laptop to write something I start with "This is how I changed my life".