It might be difficult to summarize all the opinions. But I would like to ask,
1. Have you ever met infidelity in your friends or other people?
2. How did he or she deal with such affair and the relationship with his or her mate?
3. Do you think infidelity is just private affair, or it is immoral and should be condemned by the public, or it might violate some laws and should be punished?
Why I ask these questions? I was evoked by the "Lin Dan affair" several days ago. But when I calmed down and thought about this issue, I found that infidelity has been quite a close phenomenan to me. Some of my friends were victims of infidelity of their partners, some of my friends made extramarital deeds and cheated their partners or have hurt them, some of my friends cheated each other with their partners in relationship.
In my living town of China, as I observed, infidelity is immoral and condemned by many people. In some circumstances people might use the Marriage Law to protect their rights. But I have found out something interesting or even ridiculous. The infidelity of a male is also condemned by the public, but is much acceptable and forgivable than the same thing of a female. If a woman found her husband had extramarital affair, she and her relatives might blame the husband, but finally if the husband admitted his mistake and promised amendment, the wife were more likely to forgive him and not to divorce. But if the same thing was conducted by the wife, finally the relationship would be irreparable.
I just wonder how you view this in your culture. Welcome to discuss it.
http://v.qq.com/x/page/r03328geps1.html
These days, there has been a video widely spreading on line, which is on the topic of alternatively choosing child or house if you divorce in Shenzhen. In the vedio every male interviewee chooses house for the house is too expensive, while every female chooses child for child is priceless. This video has given rise to a heated discussion around me and here I post my opinion.
I have quite a bit doubts about this video:
1. What is the motivation of the videomakers? Before they started the interview job,did they presupposed something, which may indicate that male tends to be realistic and cruel in marriage while female becomes a great mother if she had a child? Even though there are no pre-assumptions,how many people have they interviewed in total? And did they present major views in summary or just present views close to their own's?
2. The video was shot in Shenzhen, where an average salariat with monthly pay of 5000 yuan may spend over 100 years' saving(no other expenditure) by himself to buy a 100 square metres house. Hence the house impacts a lot. If they do the same interview in cities with a relatively reasonable housing-price-to-income ration, such as Changsha, Chongqing, Singapore and the small town I live in, will they receive same replies?
3. What's the economic situation of every interviewee? Money means a lot to those who lack, while it may be just a number to those who have. Hence, if the videomakers ask same question to those who are richer than the middle class, especially those who have several or even more than ten housings, will they receive same replies?
4. In social concept of China, the stress of buying house may be more severe for male before marriage. We can sometimes hear of news that mother-in-law-to-be objects that her daughter marries a man who can't afford a house. However, seldom can we hear of news that mother-in-law-to-be objects that his son marries a woman who can't afford a house. In societies where housing is not a necessity for males to get marry, such as the USA, Brazil, Europe, will the interview lead to same result?
5. The idea of gender equality has been strongly initiated in China for over a century. However, undoubtedly, the traditional thought that "male to earn money, female to keep house" has rooted in most Chinese still. Such thought influences each couple invisibly. Therefore, male tends to think that he should earn more than his wife and make greater contribution to the family. In a gender-equal society, especially in some European countries where feminism prevails, will the interview lead to same result?
6. One's attitude may not accord with his behavior. I would suggest that the videomakers go to the court to collect data about the divorce cases around these years. Then we can verify what male and female will choose under the true divorce circumstance. Isn't that more objective than street interview?
Above are my opinions on this video. You may say I haven't made my conclusion but just kept asking and asking. Yes, I seldom judge something rashly without careful and scientific verification. If there are some words to say, I oppose that people take a part for a whole by this video. I can easily show you some opposite examples. I know some girls terminated pregnancy for they were afraid their children would bring troubles. I also know some single mothers abandoned their children and remarried. However, I never overgeneralize that all the females are selfish and cruel. That is absolutly unfair for females all over the world if you just make a conclusion with arguments around you.
Hello everyone! As I am working in a real estate company, I feel curious about the housing price level of different countries or areas. In China, especially in the motropolises such as Beijing, Shanghai and Shenzhen, the housing price has been fully criticized and complained by people. In some cities, one can only afford a house with salaries of decades when they must eat or buy nothing else.
I also hope the housing price of my city, which is a small one lies in the east of Pearl River Delta of Guangdong, could go lower and lower. But in fact I am totally aware of that it's just a dream that could never come true. However, compared with the neighbor cities Guangzhou and Shenzhen, the housing price here is absolutely a drop in the bucket. And I can aford it much easier than those who live in Shenzhen. It may take several years to save the down payment and more than a decade to pay the mortgage monthly for most people here, without reducing the welfare of life.
How about the situation in your living city? I really wonder if people of other countries or areas also take a life as ""slaves of the housing". Welcome to tell me more or correct my English~
