Canada

I miss the time when I lived in Canada six years ago. This was my first long-term study experience abroad and the first time I saw snow in my life. I spent six months living in a little town named Aldergrove, located in the vicinity of Vancouver. I was living then with a homestay family. They were really nice to me. They picked me up at the airport; they lended me a bike, showed me the neighbourhood and the way to go to the school, and sometimes they would take the other students and I for sightseeing. I also had a big and well-furnished suite. Nevertheless, at that time, I was living under a strict curfew, because I was still underage. For instance, I was not supposed to go to Vancouver on my own. I still managed to sneak out with my friends on the weekends. Moreover, if I had skipped a class, my school would phone home at supper time. I was glad to meet people from all over the world, but I was upset with the fact that I could not travel there by myself . I went bersek when the school did not take me on a field trip to a historic village called Bakerville. Some of my friends showed me pictures of grizzly bears that had approached the camping site. That must have been awesome; they also lit a bonfire on a cold night. Fortunately, I was selected to take part in the next field trip to Victoria . It was an unforgettable one. We took a ferry boat to go to the island. I was hoping to see the killer whales on the way, but I did not. We spent three days there. We had the chance to visit the Empress Hotel, the Royal Museum of BC and the campus of the University of Victoria. At One night, we even did a ghost tour in the city centre. Though, we missed a very interesting attraction: The Butchart Gardens. Our instructor told us that at that time, the weather was too cold and the flowers were not blooming. There are many other things that I would like to share with you ... I hope that I will visit Canada again soon. It is a wonderful country with such a friendly people! I want to go to Whistler, to Banff, Jasper and visit the French cities too, like Quebec and Montreal. I know this is a lot for a single trip. What would you folks recommend ? Thank you very much.

Canada

I miss the time when I lived in Canada six years ago. This was my first long-term study experience abroad and the first time I saw snow in my life. I spent six months living in a little town named Aldergrove, located in the vicinities vicinity of Vancouver. I was living then with a homestay family. They were really nice to me. They picked me up at the airport; they landed loaned me a bike, showed me the neighbourhood and the way to go to the school, and sometimes they would take the other students and I for sightseeing.

(Your grammar is very good, so I'm not going to fix the problem in the above sentence for you. Think about pronoun forms in the subject and object position, and take a close look.)

I also had a big and well-furnished suite. Nevertheless, at that time, I was living under a strict curfew, because I was still underage. For instance, I was not supposed to go to Vancouver on my own. I still managed to sneak out with my friends on the weekends. Moreover, if I had skipped a class, my school would phone home at supper time. I was glad to meet people from all over the world, but I was upset with the fact that I could not travel there by myself . I went bersek when the school did not call invite me to a field trip to a historic village called Bakersville. Some of my friends showed me pictures of grizzly bears that had approached to their camping site. That must had been awesome; they also lighted lit a bonfire in on a cold night. Fortunately, I was selected to take part in the next field trip to Victoria . It was an unforgettable one. We took a ferryboat to go to the island. I was hopeful to see the killer whales on the way, but I did not. We spent three days there. We had the chance to visit the Empress Hotel, the Royal Museum of BC and the campus of the University of Victoria. At On one night, we even did a ghost tour in the city centre. Though, we missed a very interesting attraction : The Butchart Gardens . Our instructor told us that at that time, the weather was too cold and the flowers were not blooming. There are many other things that I would like to share with you ... I hope that I will visit Canada again soon. It is a wonderful country with such a friendly people! I want to go to Whistler, to Banff, and Jasper and visit the French cities too, like Quebec and Montreal. I know this is a lot for a single trip. What would you folks recommend ? Thank you very much .

First of all, you should visit Vancouver in the summer; it's so much nicer! Banff is extraordinary, one of my favorite places to visit in Canada, so that is a great idea. If you have a drivers licence, you may want to consider flying to vancouver, renting a car, and driving along highway 1 across the country to Quebec or even the East coast! That way, you could pass through Banff, Calgary, and many other interesting cities on the way.

Okay. When I look at your wonderfully written essay, I'm a bit concerned about the WALL of text that I see. How could you group it into paragraphs that both help to organize the writing, and make it easier on the eyes?

Great work!