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Mocking Jay
The narrator has just finished reading a text, and the text is beautifully written. In the phrase below she wants to convey to the reader her perception of seeing such a trivial thing as a phone number, next to this amazing text, below the last line. The narrator is a poet, so her language is imaginative and peppered with unexpected comparisons and metaphors. All this said, does the phrase below pass the text and sounds OK for English native speakers? (Presently hesitating between: written in ballpoint blue pen/written in ballpoint blue …if you help me choose one of the variants, I’d be very grateful, too)
The phrase in question:
At the end of the text, on the empty snow of the last page, behind the fence of the last line, a banal phone number was written in ballpoint blue pen.
10 apr 2024 07:49
Risposte · 4
2
I would say 'blue ballpoint (pen).
10 aprile 2024
1
'Written in ballpoint blue' sounds nice; it's more literary and wouldn't be how this would be expressed in normal speech, but for creative writing, I think it works.
11 aprile 2024
Thank you very much for your answer :)
10 aprile 2024
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Mocking Jay
Competenze linguistiche
Inglese, Francese, Italiano, Russo
Lingua di apprendimento
Inglese
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