When the teacher said “perfect work” I was thinking, it was finally finally finally over. It is so anguishing, this period of time. It is the first time to write a paper in competition with a “native speaker,” I asked myself constantly, what was my purpose, to be this grieved. I didn’t eat well, play well, sleep well, I was thinking about this paper all the time. I was so upset, but I didn’t know why I was upset. Gazing at my computer motionlessly, I didn't produce anything. But in the end, I finally made it. Everything I gained in the past was based on that it was easy to get, it was never this clumsy and hard like this right now, but this is really fulfilling, and everyday I am happy. In an interview about the paper, she further noted: It’s a difficult time for me, although I feel happy every day, I feel always something forced me, I know something I haven’t finished it, like there are something I should conquer with this essay.