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Yuna
Today, I went to my part-time job. It hardly rained, so the restaurant was very busy at lunchtime.💦After work, my friend and I shared three kinds of new pasta dishes for our staff meal. They were all very delicious, but my favorite is still the shrimp cream pasta that I always eat.🦐 I have school tomorrow, so I’m going to bed early.

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Today, I went to my part-time job. It hardly rained, so the restaurant was very busy at lunchtime. After work, my friend and I shared three kinds of new pasta dishes for our staff meal. They were all very delicious, but my favourite is still the shrimp cream pasta that I always eat. I have school tomorrow, so I am going to bed early.
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Today, I went to my part-time job. It was raining hard, so the restaurant was very busy at lunchtime.💦After work, my friend and I shared three kinds of new pasta dishes for our staff meal. They were all really delicious, but my favorite is still the shrimp cream pasta that I always eat.🦐 I have school tomorrow, so I’m going to bed early.
Great work! I assume you meant that it was 'raining hard' rather than it 'hardly rained', as the latter means that it was scarcely raining, or not much at all. We need to say 'really delicious' or 'absolutely' delicious, because 'delicious' is an 'extreme' adjective, so 'very' doesn't really fit (somehow it makes it sounds weaker, not stronger).

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