I have never seen the movie, but I can figure out what they are saying/the meaning behind them, but keep in mind I have not seen the film so there may be slight nuances in the manner in which these sentences/phrases are said!
I imagine the first one is two friends talking, saying that the third person (the man they are talking about) is going to milk the death/funeral they are attending. What this means is they are implying the third person involved is going to try to get sympathy for a long time for his loss (losing the person who died). "Captain caring" is just referring to playing the sympathy card, melodrama is someone being over-emotional about a situation.
Next one, this one is easy to understand. The comment about big ears is implying that the person has such big ears, that they are like satellite dishes (the dishes on the top of one's roof that allow you to watch TV). The NFL package line is referring to a payment plan that allows you to pay extra to get more channels to watch football (NFL), and is just further building on the fact that the person being made fun of has large ears, like satellite dishes.
You got told is slang, and means basically someone showed you/gave you an often sarcastic answer/reply or otherwise insults you. Here's a crude example that I hope will help you understand, using A, B, and C to refer to 3 different people.
A: I don't think you played very well in the game yesterday, B.
B: Yeah, well you're ugly.
C: Oh, you got told A.
The last part is just slang for basketball, "Get in" most likely refers to wishing that the ball is going to go into the hoop (hoping the shot goes in mid-shot most likely), "Play one" could mean a lot of things, so I would need to watch the scene. "Bring it in" probably refers to huddling up, allowing for a team to talk about what is going on/what needs to be done to win the game. "Bank's open" is slang for when someone is making a bank shot (shot off the backboard).