"put someone on retainer"? "chocolate mint"?
A dude got laid, then kinda lose his mind, want to marry this chick. he is not much of a player,more kinda innocent. Not like him, his mother is a really player. So his mother is about to convince him to not marry that chick.
1."For God's sake, if you're that horny,find a nice call girl, put her on retainer."
"put her on retainer",I don't understand it,what does it mean?
2:"Mom's been on more hotel pillows than a chocolate mint."
"Chocolate mint",it refers to what?

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Thanks a lot.

Answer

These are crude comments.

Usually lawyers are "put on retainer". They are given an amount of money in advance which functions as an agreement that they will be available to you, as needed.

In some hotels a small piece of chocolate is put on your pillow at the end of the afternoon. It is a gesture from the hotel.
This is a crude insult, implying that this "mom" has loose morals.