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l'amour
Abstracts from 'les plaisirs et les jours'
Le retour des romanciers ou de leurs héros sur leurs amours défuntes, si touchant pour le lecteur, est malheureusement bien artificiel. Ce contraste entre l'immensité de notre amour passé et l'absolu de notre indifférence présente, dont mille détails matériels, - un nom rappelé dans la conversation, une lettre retrouvée dans un tiroir, la rencontre même de la personne, ou, plus encore, sa possession après coup pour ainsi dire, nous font prendre conscience, ce contraste, si affligeant, si plein de larmes contenues, dans une œuvre d'art, nous le constatons froidement dans la vie, précisément parce que notre état présent est l'indifférence et l'oubli, que notre aimée et notre amour ne nous plaisent plus qu'esthétiquement tout au plus, et qu'avec l'amour, le trouble, la faculté de souffrir ont disparu. La mélancolie poignante de ce contraste n'est donc qu'une vérité morale. Elle deviendrait aussi une réalité psychologique si un écrivain la plaçait au commencement de la passion qu'il décrit et non après sa fin.
Souvent, en effet, quand nous commençons d'aimer, avertis par notre expérience et notre sagacité, - malgré la protestation de notre cœur qui a le sentiment ou plutôt l'illusion de l'éternité de son amour, - nous savons qu'un jour celle de la pensée de qui nous vivons nous sera aussi indifférente que nous le sont maintenant toutes les autres qu'elle... Nous entendrons son nom sans une volupté douloureuse, nous verrons son écriture sans trembler, nous ne changerons pas notre chemin pour l'apercevoir dans la rue, nous la rencontrerons sans trouble, nous la posséderons sans délire. Alors cette prescience certaine, malgré le pressentiment absurde et si fort que nous l'aimerons toujours, nous fera pleurer; et l'amour, l'amour qui sera encore levé sur nous comme un divin matin infiniment mystérieux et triste mettra devant notre douleur un peu de ses grands horizons étranges, si profonds, un peu de sa désolation enchanteresse...
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How to give advices without hurting people
I've read an article on skills of communication, it said most of time when people complain, they are not really seeking for solutions from others, they actually know well about the problems and they have already gotten a solution in their mind. All they need is someone's active listening, in other words, understanding.
There are five ways of reflective skills, which includes reflection of feelings,meaning,content (paraphrasing in other words), echoing ( emphasize on key point, encourage the speaker to give out more information) and summary.
I think we common people who are not pros in consulting don't have to grasp all these skills, but we should avoid our good intentions to hurt others, I think with compassion and good communication skills, misunderstanding can be greatly reduced, and we can make others' life better.
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Huko system in China
Do you know that in China there is a weird household registration system called Huko?
I guess it would be one of the most disgusting systems in this world, which manages people as if they're dogs or cows. and I've never realized how disgust it is until I wanted to apply a passport.
In China, the huko and identity card are required when apply a passport.
However, as a student, once your huko has been transferred to the school, then it's not that easy to get it out.
In my case, the first thing I have to do is to submit a request of huko to my tutor and wait for his approval, after that, the request should be checked by the Party committee of the school, the administrative supervisor of the school and the graduate school. Well, the end is still not yet, I am asked to provide the detail information of my tourist routes and the people I'm going to visit, plus the days I'm planning to spend aboard, plus my traveling contract with the travel agent.
I almost can't help from yelling out in the student office.
As a grown-up, why I have to ask for my tutor's opinion if I want to apply a passport?
Why I have to report my personal activities to these unrelated strangers if I want to go aboard?
And the most weirdest thing is that why I am the only one there who feels like all these stuff are humiliated and absurd?
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Shoes
I love collecting shoes, and some part of the following words can well express my feelings for it, so I translate it from somewhere online, and share with you guys.
"I am often wondering that it would be very interesting to collect all the shoes one person has worn from the day he was born to the day he passed away.
Shoes with different sizes and styles can loyally record people's life all the time. When we are growing up from a small baby, and walking into different life stages, every pair of shoes we worn has carried our feelings and memories, witnessing our happiness, anger, grief and joy in life.
To some extent, the life itself is somehow a rubbing process of our soles and the earth, and our life traces are the shoes we worn.
I guess everyone should has a good pair of shoes, because it can carry us to one and another beautiful places in life. That's why Cinderella's glass shoes are so irresistible for women, which can carry their dreams towards happiness."
Just for kidding, :-) I often wonder what would it happen if Cinderella met her prince with leisure shoes instead of beautiful glass ones, would the prince still fall for her? If that prince only loved her for that glass shoes, would she have to wear that damn glass shoes for all her life ? Cinderella's story really sucks! And young girls should never obsessed in glass shoes.
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Does the cat know that?
My friend, just for sharing, for fun. It's not my original.
Knowledge about facts versus knowledge about knowledge.
This is an old joke about a man who believed he was a mouse:
After some years in the mental asylum, one day he finally managed to convince himself that he was not a mouse. On the day of his release, the director bids farewell, and the man walks towards the gate. Less than five minutes later, he is back, trembling.
"What's wrong, Sir?", the director asks.
“There is a c-c-cat w-w-waiting on the street."
"But you know that you are not a mouse, Sir, right?"
"Well, yes, sure I know. But how do I know the cat knows?"
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A made-up screenplay
This is a made-up screenplay of Sheldon and Penny from douban:
http://www.douban.com/group/topic/8707865/
I translate it into English, enjoy it, my friends, LOL LOL LOL
Sheldon:( knock on the door ) Penny,Penny,Penny…
Penny:( open the door ) What’s up?
Sheldon:Could you please let me touch your boobs again?
Penny:What ??
Sheldon:Boobs are made up with a very unique material. When there is an external force put on it, it can get a significant deformation without being destroyed, and once the external force is removed, it will go back to its original state. In order to study the elastic deformation of this material, I have to take experiments on it with different size of the force, direction and duration of action to observe its deformation degree on size, shape and local relative deformation. Plus, touching your boobs feels very well, and I want to experience it again.
Penny:( Get confused at the beginning, then know what he means ) You sick freak, fuck off !!!!( close the door )
Sheldon looked somewhat confused, then went back home, and quit this idea, the two were good again.
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what's life without whimsy?
Today I spotted a very excellent translation of English into Chinese.
The English words is : what's life without whimsy?
and the translated version is :
One Chinese old saying : "不为无益之事,何以谴有涯之生"
which means 不做一些无益的事情,怎么来安慰自己度过有限的生命呢?
3. September 2011
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The most punctual clock
I suppose this is the most punctual clock in this world I've ever seen.
Have fun, my friends.
2. September 2011
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Poor Mr. Frog
From douban
Mr.Frog got heatstroke at the school sports meet.
oh poor Mr. Frog, I am sorry that I can't help to laugh every time I spot your special posture and face.
Hope you enjoy the picture below, my friends.
1. September 2011
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Duras and L'amant
L'amant is a autobiographical novel written by Duras, which massively filled with complicated desires and repressive sex, and if it wasn't for that young French girl finally realized her true feelings for her Chinese lover, most part of this moive would be actually talking about the self-abandonment of a young white girl who lived in a poor and careless family.
I can understand Duras' impulsion of self-destruction in some ways, but I can't understand why Duras chose to escape from the painful reality and herself just by sex, maybe there was no other better options for her when she was in her age 16 and didn't know how talented she was at writing.
And I guess that 30 year old Chinese young man was the most heart-broken one in this movie, for that young girl, she was too young to know what the love was, but for a man at age 30, he can tells well between desires and love, he truely loved that girl and was deeply hurt by the fact that the young girl only loved his money, and the most painful thing for him is that he was too weak to take in charge of his life, he even didn't have the freedom on his marriage.
He said to her: Oh, you're really a whore...
She actually smiled.
Then one drop of tear quietly and quickly slided from his face.
It's a good thing that Duras wrote L'amant at her 70s, instead of her 30s or earlier. Her age and experience make this story become a heavy, poignant and beautiful one.
My favorite scene in L'amant is the ending.
On the night when the ship was sailing in Indian Ocean, the girl stayed alone, when Chopin's piano flowing out of the hall, and she was suddenly reminded all the kindness and deep love of her Chinese lover, she began to realize how she loved him and how sad she was to leave him, but it was too late, they can ever meet again, then the girl hided herself with all tears, sweeping alone for her lost love.
29. August 2011
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