Apoorva
It's the rainy season! However, it was sunny in the morning. Consequently, the temperature falls in the afternoon. It might reach 25 degrees Celsius. Then, cold winds were blowing at the time. Wow, that's awesome! The weather gives the enthusiasm to learn new things and have delicious dishes. Ultimately, it became cloudy till evening and finally, it rains heavily! As the human mind swings in a similar way, the weather does today. Isn't it humorous? Nope, it's not. Because it's in nature's hand. The rain lasts for 3-4 hours which leads to refreshment and spread greenery. As trees and fields are nearby they demonstrated a peaceful environment.
16 de ago. de 2021 17:55
Correcciones · 12
2
It's the rainy season! However, it was sunny in the morning, reaching nearly 25 degrees Celsius. The temperature fell in the afternoon, providing us with a telltale sign that rain was about to come. Then, cold winds started to blow — wow, that was awesome! The chaotic weather always provides me with the courage to learn new things and try new delicious dishes. Clouds started to form until they blanketed the entire sky. As night fell, it became to rain heavily! Just as the human mind can swing from happy to sad in an instant, the weather today showed us how it can swing from a hot, tranquil today to a frightening, torrential downpour. Isn't it humorous? Nope, it's not. Because it's in nature's hand. The rain lasted for around 4 hours, and immediately afterwards, we were greeted with refreshing, luscious greenery. The trees and fields, grateful for the nutrients provided by nature, felt peaceful and calming as the world fell quiet after the pounding of rainfall.
My main issue with this paragraph is the verb tenses. I put everything into the past tense. My other question is why does the weather encourages you to have delicious dishes? Is it because it’s cold and maybe you’d like to have a hot soup? I’d be specific here. Right now, it is a bit confusing. I’m also not sure if I understand why it isn’t funny because “it’s nature’s hand”. This doesn’t make much sense to me. I had a fun time editing this! But overall I got a good sense of what the weather was like during the rainy season. Thank you for sharing!
16 de agosto de 2021
Invitado
1
It's the rainy season! However, it was sunny in the morning. Consequently, the temperature fell in the afternoon. It might have reached 25 degrees Celsius. Then, cold winds were blowing at the time. Wow, that was awesome! The weather gives enthusiasm to learn new things and have delicious dishes. Ultimately, it became cloudy till the evening and finally, it rained heavily! Today the weather is changing, as well as the human mind does sometimes. Isn't it humorous? Nope, it's not. Because it's in nature's hand. The rain lasts for 3-4 hours, which leads to refreshment and spread greenery. Trees and fields nearby demonstrate a peaceful environment.
17 de agosto de 2021
1
It's the rainy season! However, it was sunny in the morning. Consequently, the temperature falls in the afternoon. It might reach 25 degrees Celsius. Then, cold winds were blowing at the time. Wow, that's awesome! The weather gives the enthusiasm to learn new things and have delicious dishes. Ultimately, it became cloudy till evening and finally, it rains heavily! As the human mind swings in a similar way, the weather does today. Isn't it humorous? Nope, it's not. Because it's in nature's hand. The rain lasts for 3-4 hours which leads to refreshment and spread greenery. As trees and fields are nearby they demonstrated a peaceful environment. Nice one ☺️
17 de agosto de 2021
1
It's the rainy season! It was sunny in the morning, then the temperature fell in the afternoon. I thought it might reach 25 degrees Celsius. Cold winds were blowing. It was awesome! The weather made me excited to learn new things and have delicious dishes. It became cloudy in the evening and finally; it rained heavily! The human mind can change just as suddenly as the weather. Isn't it funny? Nope, it's not, because it's nature's hand. The rain lasted for 3-4 hours, which lead to the air feeling refreshing. All the water will help the greenery grow. After the rain stopped, the trees and fields felt incredibly peaceful.
I had to change it up a bit to make it make more sense. I think I managed to capture your thoughts mostly, though. I think you can omit the 'nature's hand' bit. Otherwise, I'm glad you're enjoying the rainy season. I hope this helps!
17 de agosto de 2021
1
It's the rainy season! However, it was sunny in the morning. Consequently, the temperature fell in the afternoon. It might reach 25 degrees Celsius. Then, cold winds were blowing at the time. Wow, that's awesome! The weather gives the enthusiasm to learn new things and have delicious dishes. Ultimately, it became cloudy till evening and finally, it rains heavily! As the human mind swings in a similar way, the weather does today. Isn't it humorous? Nope, it's not. Because it's in nature's hand. The rain lasts for 3-4 hours which leads to refreshment and spread of greenery. As trees and fields are nearby, they demonstrated a peaceful environment.
Well done, Apoorva! You did great! Although I agree with Emily, it's better to keep the same tense throughout the text.
17 de agosto de 2021
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