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Hey! Would be grateful if sb could check my IELTS Writing Task 1 response to the question on the pics: Many thanks in advance, and here is the essay: The line graph provides information about the correlation between age and crime in the UK last year, whereas the pie chart illustrates the disaggregation of crime by type. Overall, youngsters were most likely to commit crimes, unlike people from other age categories. The most common crimes were related to violence, while public order crimes made up the smallest share. The line graph shows that youth aged 12 to 28 years broke the law more often, unlike individuals from other age groups. While the highest number of crimes (almost one million) was committed by people aged 20, children up to 12 years were the least likely to be perpetrators. Moreover, individuals older than 28 years were also less prone to engage in crimes. Regarding the pie chart, violent crimes were the most prevalent, making up almost half of all offences. Public order crimes, however, accounted for only 9%. Property and drug-related crimes had similar levels at just under 25%.
4 saat önce
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👋Hey Italki buddies! Would be grateful if sb could correct my IELTS Writing Task 2 response to the following question: In most developed countries shopping is not only about buying the goods you need, it is also perceived as entertainment. Is it a positive or negative development? Give your own opinion and examples based on your experience. *** An increasing number of people use shopping as a way to have fun instead of treating it seriously. In my opinion, this is a negative development, which comes at an astonishing environmental cost, and has a damaging effect on the family budget. One serious problem that can arise from people purchasing goods impulsively is that it exacerbates pollution. When people become victims of consumerism and buy clothing for fun, fashion industries are prompted to produce new goods. During the manufacturing process, the air becomes polluted because of carbon emissions. Moreover, waters are also affected. To illustrate that, research has proven that the majority of all materials used by fashion industries are made from plastic, which eventually ends up in the oceans. Another issue is that shopping as an entertainment can have side effects on the family budget. In other words, instead of planning each shopping trip and expenditures, people squander their money on items they do not even need. As a result of such irrational behaviour, they may lack finances for the necessary goods. My own situation is a perfect example of this. When I was a student, I used to stroll at malls with my friends because I considered it a great pastime. However, by lapse of time, I started to notice I was saving on food and did not have a proper diet. In conclusion, although it has become more popular for people to treat shopping as entertainment, it brings about too many issues for this to be considered a positive trend.
26 May 2024 17:33
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