There are a few corrections I could make to this, but overall, it's pretty good! Would you like me to make more specific recommendations for corrections?

Hi, I've been preparing for TOEFL test recently. It will be very grateful if someone can proofread my independent writing. Thanks a lot! TOEFL writing practice Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Whether or not governments should spend more money on supporting the arts than on supporting athletics is something that needs to be considered from many different angles. While those who propose the aforementioned idea may hold that the arts cultivate people's creativity, those who oppose the idea may argue that the arts can be exclusionary to many people. Some may also say that sports are a more accessible activity than the arts. In my opinion, I believe that this statement is only partially correct. Admittedly, supporting the development of the arts can create many merits. For example, art can be seen as a more refined pastime, especially in comparison to athletics. In New York City, museums such as the MoMA allows people to visit for free every Friday. In this way, everyone has chances to access celebrated art works, allowing them to learn more about artists and the rich history behind their works. However, the speaker of this statement fails to explicitly define the "arts." Art can be defined in a variety of ways; paintings, sculptures, music, photography, and more are all classified under the label of "art." In this way, people are usually able to find something that interests them here. If someone finds that the arts are abstruse and inaccessible though, then there is no use in forcing people to like and cultivate a passion for them.

(Because their is a word count limit, I paste the rest of my writings here.) On the contrary, sports games may be much more friendly to the whole world. From this point of view, it is reasonable for governments to support the Olympic teams more. Three points illustrate this perspective. First, sports games are highly entertaining, which benefits the connections between family and friends. Take myself as an example. During the Olympic season in the year of 2020, my family and I sit in front of the television and watched our country teams' competition. It was full of content to discuss the athletes’ performances and be excited as our country team won. Secondly, when the country teams gain more supports, more people will pay attention to them, and people's identification to the country could be enhanced at the same time. For example, if the governments spend more resources on training the athletes, their chances of winning the game would increase. When the people noticed their country team won the competitions, they would also feel a sense of glory, and be grateful to the country's sponsorship. Thirdly, supporting the sports teams promotes the trend of exercising. To be more specific, people will be interested in playing sports after they noticed the athlete's performances and their healthy figures. For example, the broadcasts of the NBA games have influenced many children to play basketball. In addition, people who enter the gyms to work out has been increasing these years. In this sense, the health rate of a country can be robust In conclusion, from my examples and expositions above, it is presented that supporting arts may not be more advantageous than supporting athletics. Therefore, I do not totally agree with the speaker.