Do you like gentlemanliness? Do you like when a man opens the door for you? Or carry your bag?
I personally don't like this sort of things. I like a man who is helpful but it is different from having him to do things for me that I could perfectly do by myself. I feel like most of men do these things because it's well-regarded, and most of women are likely to fall for it, not because they truly mean it.
I once told my male friends we women should also offer our seats to men when on a bus. They challenged me to do it so I accepted. We got on the bus, I took a seat and waited for a man to stand close to my seat. He was my dad's age. I offered my seat (My friends were laughing behind his back) and the man also laughed at my offering. That's how most of men have reacted to my attempt of giving them my seat. Most of them seemed to be tired, old or sick; and even though they refused it.
I also find annoying the stare some women give to men on the bus when they are sitting and there's a woman standing beside them. Like men had to offer their seat to women because a woman is a weak creature. No! We can also handle it. We are also strong.
I'm curious to know your opinion on this matter. :)
Hey there Ana Maria,
I'm not sure if you meant for this post to be for women only or if everyone can respond, but in my opinion, there's absolutely nothing wrong with being kind and considerate.
Generally speaking, men who offer to give women a hand don't see women as being weak or fragile, it's more of a respect thing. If a friend cones to visit me at my house for example, I'll prepare a drink and/or some food for them not because they can't do it themselves and not because I have a problem with them making things for themselves in my home, it's simply a matter of courtesy.
If someone offered to give me a hand with something, I wouldn't reject the offer even if I could do it myself. Only in a situation where I thought I'd be an inconvenience would I decline. Aside from that, no.
There's nothing wrong with allowing a person to be a gentleman. In fact, think of the alternative. This is something that many women are starting to complain about. Men aren't men, they aren't considerate, they aren't chivalrous, etc. That's because for the last generation or two, men have been told not to do these things.
I'm of the frame of mind that if something isn't bad, theres no reason to reject it or push it back. Appreciate what goodness comes your way and say thank you.
It's funny how world is changing about that. Soon we will have to apologize for being kind. For example I would keep the door open for you but you may be offended by that, because you're an independent lady.
When I see a woman who is struggling with something heavy I always ask them if they need a big strong man to help them, then I say "Because if you need one I can go look for one for you". That usually gets a laugh.
Yes, I like gentlemanliness very much if the man is really gentleman and he does not wait something for his behaviour.
I think if you're a decent human being you hold the door open for others out of politness, please don't take that gesture the wrong way, you wouldn't be too happy if they let the door slam in your face.
I have offered my seat to elderly men and they have said no to me, I think it could be a pride thing, they might not feel their age.
I'm going to be honest, it just sound like your quite bitter towards men in some aspects. It's sad that todays society wants to shame people for manners, and that men are being demonised for the thing between their legs.