Impulse is the devil
Did you
ever have
an experience
where you acted on a sudden impluse to do something and regretted
it later? I have one. (<em>Because you're telling a story about something that happened to you, I put your verbs here in the past tense. You also need the "it" to refer to the previous action</em>.)
Once, I went shopping by myself. I saw a beautiful bag in the window of an expensive shop and I liked it very much. I went in and looked at it for a moment, but nobody come to greet me.
I tried it on when a sarcastic voice
above me said:' the bag is very expensive, if you can not afford it, please don't ask to see it.' (<em>above me instead of "up</em>")
To my surprise, I saw a
middle-aged woman who was a large,unsmiling lady in a tight black dress.
She came down from the second floor of the shop. I was very
astonished at what she said. (<em>past tense!</em>)
'How do you know I can not afford it?' I said angrily.
The woman was busy cleaning her shop and did not pay attention to me at all.' So do you want to buy it?' she glanced at me scornfully and asked drily.
I regretted answering in the way I did, but I said:'Excuse my interrupting you. I hate to interrupt a woman when she is busy working, but would you mind wrapping it up for me?'
'
Sure, I would be very happy to do that.' she answered with smile. Meanwhile, she quickly
wrapped and handed it to me. 'One thousand yuan, please.' (<em>We know she's going to wrap it up for you by now, so the future tense works best here.</em>)
'It is very expensive.' I said to myself. I paid the money reluctantlly and took it out of the shop. Even if I liked it, I did not have any clothes to match it.There is a saying is that impulse is the devil. And that day the devil provided me a very expensive lesson.
Your writing in English is pretty good! You seem to have a good hold on the past tense. There was only one spelling error- excellent!