Ezzat Yaseen
Think for a moment We all fantasize about a better life . Sometimes we think that a certain day , according to our personal circumstances , would be the start of a happy life . The period between that date and the current moment is perceived as an uncountable period of our lives , because it's full of pessimism and frustration . We feel that all days are similar and boring . I think such a thought is a silent killer and might destroy us . We must take advantage of every single moment of our lives as long as we are healthy and still breathing . First we should learn how to enjoy life ; we should learn how to love other people , which is the key to having a healthy and satisfied conscience . If we could reach that point of equilibrium we would be able to feel that our lives are full of wonderful meanings , and we would feel sorry about the days of our lives lost to pessimism and frustration . Hello I need a professional correction for the text, because I am going to write a book and this text is a part of it. Regards
Feb 23, 2021 5:38 PM
Corrections · 8
Think for a moment: We all fantasize about a better life. Sometimes we think that a certain day, according to our personal circumstances, would be the start of a happy life. The period between that date and the current moment is perceived as an uncountable period of our lives, because it's full of pessimism and frustration. We feel that all days are similar and boring. I think such a thought is a silent killer and might destroy us. We must take advantage of every single moment of our lives as long as we are healthy and still breathing. First we should learn how to enjoy life; we should learn how to love other people, which is the key to having a healthy and satisfied conscience . If we could reach that point of equilibrium we would be able to feel that our lives are full of wonderful meaning, and we would feel sorry about the days of our lives lost to pessimism and frustration.
This is a lovely sentiment and well-written. As a general rule, the commas and end marks should have no space before them, only a space after. [This may simply have been a technology issue when you copied the passage.] "Meanings" has been changed to meaning. In this usage, the singular is correct because you are suggesting a sense of meaning, rather than a number of different meanings (like definitions). Also, if you are writing formally, you will want to change "it's" to the more formal "it is." If you are taking a more intimate conversational tone with your reader, however, using "it's" is either acceptable or desirable. When you say "perceived as an uncountable period of our lives," you may want to choose a word other than "uncountable." In the United States, at least, that word feels odd. Do you mean "endless," as in it feels like it will last forever? Another stronger word for that would be "interminable," which gives a negative feeling that this situation will never go away. Or perhaps you had a different feeling that I didn't perceive. My final observation is about the word "conscience" in the phrase "the key to having a healthy and satisfied conscience." In American and British usage, the word "conscience" is almost always related to a moral sense of right and wrong. If you are trying to make the point that loving others is right and that doing what is right will give us satisfaction, then I would leave the word "conscience" in place. If you are making the point that loving others will give us a sense of peaceful satisfaction (without any sense of right or wrong), I would choose a word like "existence," "life," or even "spirit," which can be used in either a religious or non-religious sense in English. In either case -- right-and-wrong or self-satisfaction -- I agree with your sentiment! Good luck with your writing!
Feb 23, 2021 6:25 PM
Think for a moment: we all fantasize about living a better life. Sometimes we think that a certain day, according to our personal circumstances, will be the start of a happy life. The period between that date and the current moment is perceived as insignificant because it is full of pessimism and frustration. We feel that all days are similar and boring. I think such a thought is a silent killer and might destroy us. We must take advantage of every single moment of our lives as long as we are healthy and still breathing. First, we should learn how to enjoy life. We should learn how to love other people, which is the key to having a healthy and satisfied conscience . If we can reach that point of equilibrium, we will be able to feel that our lives are full of meaning, and we will regret the days of our lives lost to pessimism and frustration. Hello, I need professional editing for the text because I am going to write a book.
I hope this helps! I am a professional teacher and a native speaker. If you need any more help, feel free to look at my teacher profile!
Feb 23, 2021 11:16 PM
Think for a moment... We all fantasize about a better life. Sometimes we think that once we reach a certain day that would be the start of a happy life. The period between that date and now is perceived as difficult. This is because it's full of pessimism and frustration. We feel that every day is similar, nothing changes. I think such a thought is a silent killer and might destroy us. We must take advantage of every single moment in our lives as long as we are healthy and still breathing. First we should learn how to enjoy life; we should learn how to love other people, which I believe is the key to a fulfillment. If we could reach that point of equilibrium we would feel that our lives are full of wonderful meaning. Furthermore, we would feel sorry about all the days lost to pessimism and frustration. Hello I need a professional correction for the text, because I am going to write a book and this text is a part of it. Regards
I'm not a professional, but hope it is helpful to have a "reader's view" as well!
Feb 23, 2021 6:27 PM
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Ezzat Yaseen
Language Skills
Arabic, English, Spanish
Learning Language
English, Spanish