Wendy
A TRIP 5 years ago , when I was in the senior year of my university , my parents came to Qindao to see me without telling me . I was very surprised because they had never came to see me during the period that I was in university . It was so sudden that I had no time to book a hotel.But my father told me that he had already reserved one before they came. Although I had stayed in Qindao for almost 4 years , I went to the beach rarely ,for our school was far away from the seaside. My parents drove to my school to pick me up ,and then we went directly to the hotel which was near the beach. When I entered the hotel ,I was so excited,there was a large garden outside ! And our room had an amazing balcony where we could get a nice view of the sea . At those days ,we enjoyed a variety of sea food ,and we visited a well-known cathedral which was built by a genius architect 100 years ago . Also , we waited for the sunset on the beach together. We really had a impressed memory there.
Nov 23, 2016 4:55 PM
Answers · 2
Hello Wendy, texts like this are better posted in 'notebook' as it is easier to correct and easier for you to see the corrections. Thank you.
November 23, 2016
because they had never come to see me during the period that I was in university = because they never came // they had never come to see me during the time I was at university. ('Period' is correct but it sounds formal and unnatural here) Although I had stayed in Qindao for almost 4 years, = although I had been living in Qindao for almost 4 years ('Stay' implies a short time - a week or so) I went to the beach rarely = I rarely went to the beach for our school was far away from the seaside = because our school was far away from the seaside. ('For' is more old-fashioned.) When I entered the hotel = when I got to the hotel Where we could get a nice view of the sea = where we had a nice view of a the sea. At those days ,we enjoyed a variety of sea food = during that time, we enjoyed a variety of sea food Also , we waited for the sunset on the beach together = we also watched the sunset on the beach together We really had a impressed memory there = we had a fantastic time there // the sunset was very impressive // I have very strong memories of my time there // or something similar!! Commas in English go directly after the word, with a space afterwards: When I got to the hotel, I was so excited. Hope that helps!
November 23, 2016
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Wendy
Language Skills
Chinese (Mandarin), English, French
Learning Language
English