Life is... Well I just want to say my story. I don't care that I write in wrong sentences or not. I just want to share how I feel. I don't have anyone to talk. I think italki is the best place. You all here don't even know me, so there's nothing to afraid of! In this last 3 years I found that life is... Since my father secretly married a woman and starting laying to us about money it's so much hurt and now he is not living with us anymore. Having 3 little sisters and 1 little brother makes even harder. I have to replace my father place. I always don't want to show my tears, I am a strong sister for them. Me and mom selling foods in front of our house for my sister's education. I still don't get any new job since I have completed my last job 1 year ago. I feel ashamed cause I can't help my mom at all. You know? Every night I can't sleep worrying about what my brother and sisters will be. I have to work hard for them. I have to! 1 month ago, we move to new small house because we don't have any house actually. We have nothing to pay, so me move from one house to another. I hate my Father, he didn't give us any legacy. He just comes visit us like once a week with bring nothing but mocking us everytime we ask money for foods and education. We used to be so happy few years ago. But now everything has changed. I lost weight 12 kilo grams, do not ask me why. I have kept my tears this last 3 years, but now I can't keep it anymore. I need to share how I feel, though it's just a note. My mom is sick cause she got an accident. A family serve my mom like a servant. They asked mom anything. Pick up vegetables by motorcycle, cooking, ask anything even anything that doesn't make sense. And I got surprised when mom coming home crying cause that family bullying her in a very rude way. I can accept that. I was hoping I got a job when I offer my ability to a company one week ago. I was so much hoping I got. But they rejected me in a weird ways. I was hoping cause it not only me in me. But it's me, my sisters, my brother and my mom. People say that God fulfill every dream. Does he? People say there is always something great after bad. I still dont feel it, but I keep believing.