🌿 The Woman Who Shrinks: Why Your Voice Changes in English
Have you ever felt that your English version of yourself is smaller than the real you?
You join a meeting feeling confident — ideas ready, thoughts clear — but the moment you start speaking English, something shifts.
Your voice softens.
Your body tenses.
You begin monitoring every word instead of living your message.
This is what I call “the shrink moment.”
It’s not visible to others, but you can feel it.
And it’s not about vocabulary or grammar.
It’s about disconnection.
The Invisible Switch
In your native language, you lead naturally.
You know the rhythm of conversation.
You can interrupt gracefully, joke, and speak with presence.
But when you switch to English, the rhythm changes — and so does your identity.
You start performing instead of expressing.
Your confident self becomes cautious, careful, smaller.
It’s as if the signal between your true self and your English self weakens.
That’s the moment fluency becomes emotional, not linguistic.
The Mirror Moment
I once worked with a woman who said,
“I feel like my brain and my soul disconnect when I speak English.”
Her English was excellent.
Her identity wasn’t.
She didn’t need more lessons — she needed permission to take up space again.
When we speak a second language, our nervous system often carries memories of correction, judgment, or comparison.
So every time we open our mouth, a quiet part of us says,
“Please, don’t hurt me again.”
That’s not a mistake. It’s protection.
🌱 The Reconnection
You don’t need to fix your English.
You need to reconnect the woman who speaks it.
Start by noticing when you shrink — your posture, your breathing, your tone.
Then remind yourself:
“I’m still me. Even in English.”
That small act of awareness begins to rewire your relationship with the language.
Because confidence doesn’t come from more words — it comes from returning to yourself.
If it resonates, You can explore this work privately with me.
