I REMEMBER...
I remember the majesty of the forests from Finland... Thousands and thousands of gracefully svelte, endless trees grasping on the deep ground, and raising exultant toward the eternity.
I remember the purity of white and the range of gray and brown painted the landscapes. And the silence, I remember that mystical silence all around.
I remember how the spring came without asking for license, and from one day to the next, the white and gray became green... Oh, what such a palette of bright greens!
I remember the first shy sprouts coming out from the trees that woke up from their winter lethargy. And the first flowers showed their beauty in the fields and gentle hillsides above what had been a single-white coloured robe of linen.
I remember the colors woke up and, in unison, birds started to sing being all that like a part of the great concert that Nature wisely, harmonically orchestrate.
I remember the sky from Finland. What could I tell about the sky... I love it. Blues and pinks I had never seen before. Like a mystery, like an impossibility, unreal from my spanish eyes.
And I remember your eyes, the eyes of a man from finland still more beautiful than that blue, finnish sky.
ค้นหาจากครู ภาษาอังกฤษ หลากหลายคน...
การแก้ไข · 5
1
I REMEMBER...
[Some of the words are not commonly used but I've kept them in to maintain the poetic tone you seem to be going for.]
I remember the majesty of the forests from Finland... Thousands upon and thousands of gracefully svelte and endless trees grasping upwards from on the deep ground, and raising rising exultantly toward the eternity.
I remember the purity of the white and the range variety of grays and browns that painted the landscapes. And the silence, I remember that mystical silence all around.
I remember how the spring came without asking for license, and from one day to the next, the white and gray became ... green... Oh, what such a palette of bright greens!
I remember the first shy sprouts coming out from the trees that as they woke up from their winter lethargy. And the first flowers showed their beauty in the fields and gentle hillsides above what had been a single white coloured robe of linen robe.
I remember the colors waking woke up and, in unison, the birds sung started to sing being all that like playing their a part in some of the great concert, harmoniously orchestrated by that Nature itself. wisely, harmonically orchestrate.
I remember the sky from Finland. What could I tell about the sky?.. I love it. Blues and pinks I had never seen before. Like a mystery, like an impossibility, unreal to from my Spanish eyes.
And I remember your eyes, the eyes of a man from Finland still more beautiful than that blue, Finnish sky.
0
Amazing! How easy you did it and how easy it looks now. I like the concretión and the way you build the sentences.
After all you are a writer. I was very lucky that you read my text and you spent your time to help me.
I love writing, but obviously I'm not a professional.
Good luck!
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(Here's how it could have been written if you were having an intelligent chat with a friend, sharing your feelings about this place you visited. Not holding back with the imagery.)
I remember how beautiful the forests in Finland were. You could see thousands of them at a time, all graceful and thin, just reaching into the sky.
I remember the colours. The whites, the grays and the browns. They covered the landscape. But I also remember how quiet it was, that mystical silence.
I remember how the spring would arrive out of the blue, then day after day the whites and the grays would turn to green. Bright green!
I remember the first sprouts emerging from the trees, like they were waking up from being asleep all winter. And the first flowers appeared on the fields and the hillsides. Before then, it had been just a blanket of snow.
And as the colours woke up, so too did the birds. It was like an orchestra conducted by nature itself.
I remember the Finnish sky. What can I say? I loved it. Blues and pinks like I'd never seen before. Like a mystery. Unreal. Almost impossible for my Spanish eyes to fully take in.
And I remember your eyes, the eyes of that man from Finland.Still more beautiful than that blue, Finnish sky.
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