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Shehzad
First notebook entry: Introducing myself Hi, this is Shehzad from Pakistan, Karachi. I'm 23 years old. I speak Urdu as a first language and I want to learn English as a second language. I want to learn english to help me improve my education because English has become necessary to learn in any kind of field.
9 ธ.ค. 2011 เวลา 20:47
การแก้ไข · 9
9

First notebook entry: Introducing Myself

Hi! This is Shehzad from Karachi, Pakistan, karachi. I'm 23. I'm speak Urdu as a first language, and I wanna want to learn English as a second language. I wanna want to learn English to help me improve my education better, because English has become so necessary to for learning in any kind of field.

 

Avoid reduced forms like "wanna" in writing.

9 ธันวาคม 2011
2

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

hi, (Hi) This is Shehzad from Pakistan, karachi. I'm 23 (years old). I'm (I) speak Urdu as a first language and I wanna (want to) learn English as a second language. I wanna (want to) learn english to help me improve my education better, because English has become so necessary to learn in any kind of field

 

Good job

 

1. Start all your new sentences with a cappital letter. Hi

 

8 ตุลาคม 2012
1

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

Hi! This is Shehzad from Karachi, Pakistan. I'm 23 years old. I speak Urdu as a first language and I want to learn English as a second language. I am interested in learning English to help me improve my education because it has become so necessary for success in any field.

 

Comment: It was a good attempt. However, 'wanna' is an informal contraction so you can use it but only in casual conversation with people you know. Professionally and in formal conversation, you would use 'want to'.

27 มีนาคม 2013

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

hi, This is Shehzad from Pakistan, karachi. I'm 23. I'm speak Urdu as a first language and I wanna learn English as a second language. I wanna learn english to help me improve my education better, because English has become so necessary to learn in any kind of field.

 

'wanna' is a slang word but for proper english grammar it is correct to say 'I want to'. You do not need to say 'to help me improve my education better' it would either just be 'to help me improve my education' or 'to help make my educuation better' (The first one would be best) Also, It would be 'I speak Urdu' not 'I'm speak Urdu' but your English is good overall! :))

21 พฤษภาคม 2013

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

Hi,<em> (Remember to capitalize the beginning of a sentence!)</em> this <em>("this" doesn't need to be capitalized.)</em> is Shehzad from Pakistan, Karachi. I'm 23. I'm <em>(I am speak Urdu?)</em> speak Urdu as a first language and I wanna<em> (want to, "wanna" is informal)</em> learn English as a second language. I wanna want to learn English to help me improve my education better, because English has become so necessary to learn in any kind of field.

12 ตุลาคม 2014
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