Homework. Part 1

I’d like to tell you about someone who is my huge inspiration in this essay(it is unusual to use 'work' to refer to a workpiece, usually we'd be more specific)– Demi Lovato (you add a 'summary' at the end of dashes, usually not more information).
She was born in Dallas, Texas *on* the 20th of August in an *average* family. Her biggest dream was to be a young superstar. She started singing at age 3. However, from that moment on,an unfortunate incident occurred at home: her dad left the family. Demi really loved him. When she was 7 years old (or you could say, '4 years on,..')she took up a role in the “Barney and the friends” series on Disney channel, where she grew an interest in acting, though she never gave up singing. Studying at school was really tough on her, because the other children did not (if you are doing this for some form of formal school work, avoid "'nt"'s shortened forms like can't and shouldn't, didn't, etc.) take her or her dream seriously. She became depressed (or demoralized? refrain from beginning a sentence with Because). She became famous after her premiere film “Camp Rock” at 15 years of age. Being in a state of depression while becoming famous (you want to emphasise the simultaneity here) made her really stressed (it was stressful, adj to describe a noun, situation; a state of being is always- stressed). Her agent and family wanted her to be perfect, but (thought/believed) she wasn’t. She thought that she wasn’t as beautiful as she could be. She did not eat and eventually developed an eating disorder, which no one knew about. Nonetheless, becoming famous had its perks for Lovato; she found a boyfriend while acting on “Camp Rock”.(semi colon to link two linked but independent clauses) He understood and supported her. During that time, (during for a duration) she recordered 2 albums which are called “Don’t Forget” and “Here we go again”. But come 2010, fans everywhere were shocked when the media broke the news that the young star put her tour on hold while being sent for rehabilitation. At that time, (an age holds true for a year which is a long time, so we dont really use moment, but rather a time to express this) she was 18 years old. “When the clock struck (past tense of strike is struck) at 12, I couldn’t believe that I had spent New Year in a rehabilitation center” – recounted Demi Lovato in her film “Stay Strong”, which premiered in 2011, and was based on her autobiography. In that very film, she revealed her teenage problems-- facts about her which shocked every member of the audience. After leaving the rehabilitation center and completing her film, she recorded her third album, “Unbroken”. This song (song or album? they mean different things) was really different from other ones before. (you might want to elaborate about the difference) She then started a new tour (maybe talk about where, what was special). In 2012 Simon Cowell called her and invited to be a judge (there are more than one, so you should not use the judge) on the programme “X-factor”. In this show she became good friends with Britney Spears and some new celebrities in the USA. In March 2013, she came to Russia for a concert. I really regret that I couldn’t go (when you say 'come' it means you are there or talking to someone who was/is there). Although Demi was ill, she did not cancel the show, and instead started singing. She was shocked and perhaps touched that she had so many fans in Russia. Currently, she is working on a second season of “x-factor” and recordered her fourth album “DEMI”.

Other half here:http://www.italki.com/entry/344815

let me know if you need any further help :)

Homework. Part 1 (Please, Find mistakes. It's really important to me)

I’d like to tell you about my huge inspiration – Demi Lovato in this work.
She was born in Dallas, Texas in 20th of August in usual family. Her biggest dream was becoming a new young superstar. She started singing at age 3. But on that moment she has some problems at home: her dad has gone from family. Demi really loved him. When she was 7 years old she take part in “Barney and the friends” on Disney channel. At that moment she was inspired by actress roles and continues acting, but still have been continued singing. Studying at school was really hard for her, because other children didn’t realise her dream seriously. Because of it she had depressed. She became famous after premiere film “Camp Rock” when she was 15. Being in depressed and becoming famous make her really stressful. Her agent and family wanted to see her perfect at all, but she wasn’t. She thought that she wasn’t as beautiful as she could be. She didn’t eat, had eating disorder. But no one knew about that. Becoming famous has another side of it. She found a boyfriend while acting on “Camp Rock”. He understood and supported her. On that period of time she recordered 2 albums which calls “Don’t Forget” and “Here we go again”. But in 2010 every fan was shocked when media write, that young star Demi Lovato stopped her tour and went to rehabilitation center. On that moment she was 18 years old. “When the clock strucked 12 times, I couldn’t believe that I spend New Year in rehabilitation center” – said Demi Lovato in her autobiography film “Stay Strong”, which was premiered in 2011. In this film she told about all her teenage problems. There are so many facts about her, which shocked every person, who watched it. After rehabilitation center and film she was recorders third her album, called “Unbroken”. This song really different from other ones. And she started new tour. In 2012 Simon Cowell called her and invited to be the judge on “X-factor”. During this show she became good friends with Britney Spears and some new celebrities in the USA. In March 2013 she came to Russia with concert. I really regret that I couldn’t come. But Demi was ill, but she didn’t canceled show, and started sinning. She was shocked that she has so many fans in Russia. Now she working on 2 season of “x-factor” and recordered her 4 album “DEMI”.

Other half here:http://www.italki.com/entry/344815

Homework. Part 1

I’d like to tell you about my huge inspiration – Demi Lovato in this work.
She was born in Dallas, Texas in 20th of August in common family. Her biggest dream was becoming a new young superstar. She started singing at age 3. But on that moment she has some problems at home: her dad left household. Demi really loved him. When she was 7 years old she take part in “Barney and the friends” on Disney channel. At that moment she was inspired by actress roles and continues acting, but still have been continued singing. Studying at school was really hard for her, because other children didn’t take her dream seriously. Because of it she depressed. She became famous after premiere film “Camp Rock” when she was 15. Being in depressed and becoming famous make her really stressful. Her agent and family wanted to see her perfect at all, but she wasn’t. She thought she wasn’t as beautiful as she could be. She didn’t eat and had eating disorder. But no one knew about that. Becoming famous has another side. She found a boyfriend while acting on “Camp Rock”. He understood and supported her. On that period of time she recordered 2 albums which calls “Don’t Forget” and “Here we go again”. But in 2010 every fan was shocked when media write, that young star Demi Lovato stopped her tour and went to rehabilitation center. On that moment she was 18 years old. “When the clock strucked 12 times, I couldn’t believe that I spend New Year in rehabilitation center” – said Demi Lovato in her autobiography film “Stay Strong”, which was premiered in 2011. In this film she told about all her teenage problems. There are so many facts about her which shocked every person who watched it. After rehabilitation center and film she was recorders third her album, called “Unbroken”. These songs were really different from other ones. And she started new tour. In 2012 Simon Cowell called her and invited to be the judge on “X-factor”. During this show she became good friends with Britney Spears and some new celebrities in the USA. In March 2013 she came to Russia with concert. I really regret that I couldn’t come. Demi was ill, but she didn’t canceled show, and started singing. She was suprised that she has so many fans in Russia. She is now working on 2nd season of “x-factor” and recordered her 4 album “DEMI”.

Other half here:http://www.italki.com/entry/344815